Forgotten Past
by Krazy Ky-Sta Hatter
Summary: The Doctor starts opening up to Rose. He tells her fondly of his childhood and the girl who had stolen his hearts. How is it that Rose ISN'T jealous? And why is the Doctor so worried about her Dad's old pocket watch? The answers may tear her life apart.
1. Madness

_**Hello!**_

_**Just talking a short break from writing 'A Life with Rose', because it's mostly set and I don't want to forget this one. It actually came to me in a dream. I was dreaming from Zeta's point of view.**_

_**Just goes to show that I really am becoming: A) too Doctor Who obsessed (if there is such a thing). And 2… no, B) too book obsessed. I dream book ideas and I think in writing format. I even think 'she thought forlornly' after I have a sad thought!**_

_**Anyway, not very many instantly recognisable characters in this chapter. But just hang in there; it's just the prologue after all. And if you do know who everyone is, then bloody good on you!**_

_**Enjoy!**_

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**Madness**

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They say that some become inspired, some run away, and some… some go mad.  
>.<p>

Zeta. That was to be her name once she had passed the initiation test. She had already locked away her real name; it was never to be told again. Names were dangerous things.

Zeta had always hoped that she would be one of the lucky ones who would be inspired. She was beautiful, and brighter than the average Time Lady. She glowed brighter than Gallifrey's two suns. She was only young, a child, a Time Tot.

And yet everyone had such high hopes for her. Because she was not like others of her kind. They could tell that even as a babe, she had been able to see the time lines better than anyone before. She could almost bend them to her will. A power that strong could be dangerous.

That was why she had been taken from her parents. They had to coach her to use her especially strong gift. The gift of the Time Lords was not cast over lightly. The girl had to be moulded into exactly what they wanted and needed. So, she had been raised by a Matron in the halls of the Lord President's country home.

Despite how harshly she was treated and how strictly they tried to keep her in line, her life on Mount Cadon was brilliant. She never did like the rules, and often she would sneak out to see her friends. Theta lived right next to her; he was a sweet adventurous boy. He could run so fast, it seemed he never stopped. And Koschei, whose father owned estates on Mount Perdition. The three of them would run through the long red grass of the mountain slopes, laughing and living the true life of a child…

Until she would be caught, and dragged half screaming back to her prison of a home. She could still see the sadness that would fill Theta's eyes as he saw her pain. And she would always remember the haunting sight of Koschei. She could see a little part of him die and fill with hatred and disgust as he watched her being taken captive by their own kind.

She missed them. The both of them had been initiated into the Academy a few months before. Life had been so horrid without them. They say that when Theta had looked, he had run. It didn't surprise her in the least. She was so excited and scared about tonight. Because it meant she was going to see them again.

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So there she stood, in her long black initiation robes, only eight years old. They christened her and called her forth. Her hands shook as she took tiny steps towards the Untempered Schism. She hoped that she would be inspired. That she would have the courage to stand there, strong and proud. That she wouldn't lose her mind to it… She was so young… so naive.

She finally came to a stop, standing upon the Seal of Rassilon. A gasp was drawn from her lips as she lifted her head and looked. Before her stood a tear in the fabric of reality, the Time Vortex exposed to her. She watched, entranced, as the blues swirled together. For a moment she could see everything. All that was, all that is, and all that ever could be. Billions and trillions of years, all of time and space pouring into her head. Then a torrent of gold energy leapt out at her.

And the madness took her.


	2. Shared Dreams

**Shared Dreams**

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Rose stood in the fields of the mountains overlooking the citadel. It was beautiful. She didn't know if this was actually what Gallifrey looked like, but ever since the Doctor had described it to her, this was what she saw.

"Theta!" she heard a young girl call out. "Koschei!" She turned to see two boys sitting in the long red grass, a pretty little girl running towards them. They couldn't have been older than seven.

"Zeta!" one of the boys', who was dressed in tones or red, cried in delight. Somehow Rose knew that these weren't their real names. It was as if their real names had been burned from all memory. She couldn't help laughing as the girl ran and lunched herself at the boy. They fell over laughing and hugging. The other boy, who was dressed in darker shades of blue, smiled and rolled his eyes.

"What took you so long, Zeta?" the boy in blue asked. At this the girl pulled a sour face.

"Matron was keeping a closer eye on me today. The Lord President doesn't want me messing around when our birthdays are getting so close."

Suddenly the boy in red cracked up laughing. "What did you do?" he cried.

"Oh, you know," she said adorably and very slyly. "I may have slipped some _clorossa_ in her drink." Both of the boy's mouths fell open. "I don't think I was caught," she added. "And she would have fallen unconscious before she even realised what happened."

"You are the most devious little Time Lady _ever!_" the boy in red giggled uncontrollably.

"Why thank you, Thete," she did a mock curtsey, which was oddly graceful despite the fact she was sitting down.

Rose was standing right beside them by now, she was sure that they couldn't see her. They must only be a memory… the Doctor's memory? He was the only one who remembered Gallifrey. So, how was she having _his_ dream?

"Uh oh," the boy in blue, who must be Koschei, sighed. Zeta smiled with glee. They were both looking at Theta who was grinning madly at her, a bright light in his eyes.

"I know _that_ look!" she giggled.

In the next second she had jumped up and Theta was chasing her. Koschei was up and following after them. They ran and they laughed and they tumbled down the hills for what seemed like ages. Rose laughed as she joined them, despite the fact she couldn't actually be a part of the memory.

Part of her mind wondered if these - or just one of them - were the Doctor's children. Quickly she pushed that thought to the back of her mind. She had come to accept the fact he once had kids, but it was still rather strange to her.

Soon Koschei had to leave, and he waved goodbye to his friends and ran off to his home. Theta and Zeta turned to each other and continued to laugh. She smiled at them, they were so cute. They were like those little kids that you saw together and just knew that they would grow up together, have their trials, and then always find their way back to each other in the end, and grow old together. She listened as they talked. After a while Zeta managed to convince Theta to stop running and just lie and look at the passing clouds that drifted lazily across the burnt orange sky. They stayed together even when the second sun started to set.

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"What do you think you're going to do?" Zeta asked. Theta jumped down from the tree he had been in and leant against it, he had a bundle of silver leaves in his hands and he was trying to twist them into something.

"I don't know," he replied. "I already run enough… And everyone already seems to think I'm mad." They both giggled. "Who knows?"

Slowly the smile faded from Zeta's face and she looked very solemn. "I'm afraid I'm going to go mad," she whispered quietly. Theta's eyes rose to find hers and he stood and hugged her.

"You're not going to go mad. I promise," he told her. "You're brilliant and sweet and far too intelligent to lose your mind to it." Smiling softly he held up the leaves he had been playing with. They had been twisted together with the red grass to make a pretty silver flower. He brushed back her hair and tucked it behind her ear. Zeta smiled and blushed. Then she leant forward and gave him a quick peck on the lips. Theta's eyes widened in surprise and he blushed too, but the smile never left his face.

"Zeta!" an angry shriek sounded through the mountains. The smile dropped from the children's faces and their eyes widened in horror.

Theta slipped his hand into Zeta's, looked up at her and smiled. "Run," he grinned. And they did. Right into the trees. They didn't plan on ever stopping.

**?...DW…?**

Rose woke, smiling. She was lying on the couch in the Library. The Doctor was curled up beside her, his hands on her temples. She hardly dared breathe. She hardly ever saw the Doctor asleep and he looked so adorable. His hair was in even more disarray than usual and he had a faint smile on his lips. But, as if sensing her watching him, his eyes fluttered open.

"Hello," he murmured sleepily.

"Hi… Um, Doctor?"

"Mmm?"

"Your hands are still on my temples."

He looked at her in surprise. "Oh, sorry," he said taking his hands away.

There was a perfectly innocent reason why they were curled together, asleep on the couch. No really there was! And it wasn't just her trying to convince herself otherwise, either.

The last few days had been exhausting. Jackie had rung her up in delighted hysterics because Mickey was back. They had been worried and went down to see what the trouble was. Mickey was in the parallel world, he couldn't be there. So they were surprised to find that it really was him. And he wasn't alone. The parallel Pete and Jake were there too. The ensuing days resulted with the first of the ghosts, which according to Mickey, were Cybermen. They traced the activity back to some anti-Doctor organisation called 'Torchwood' and managed to close the crack down and send back the 'Void Ship' (or what ever it was) before any real harm could be done. Okay, so they had had to face a handful of Cybermen and four Daleks, but in the end the two fought and cancelled each other out. The last Dalek had been destroyed by Jake and the rest of the Daleks and Cybermen were effectively trapped in something the Doctor called the 'Void'. Or as Rose liked to call it 'Hell'. Right where they belonged.

But then Mickey, Jake and Pete became trapped on this side. Not that any of them were complaining, really. Pete was already shacked back up with her mother. The ordeal had resulted in two very tired time travellers. They had sat together in the Library for a relaxing cup of tea next to the fire. Rose had a killer headache, so the Doctor had begun to massage her temples… and that was the last thing she remembered. They must have fallen asleep like that.

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"Have a nice dream?" she asked him.

"Yeah. Yeah, I guess so," she smiled faintly. But there was a shadow beneath is eyes. She always saw it when she knew he was thinking of his lost home. Gently she placed her hand on his arm.

"It looked lovely," she told him.

His eyes widened in surprise. "How do you-?"

"I think you might have projected your dream into my head with the whole touchy thing," she said somewhat guiltily. Much to her surprise, he didn't close up, in fact, he smiled at her.

"Beautiful wasn't it?"

Smiling back, she nodded to him. "So who were they? The children."

The Doctor was silent for a long time. Rose began to doubt that he was going to say anything. But he did. "Well… Theta. Um, that was me." She looked at him slightly in shock, but really she wasn't surprised. He acted a lot like that anyway. Rose didn't quite think she was being literal all those times she had told him he was like a child. "Zeta and Koschei were my best friends. Children didn't really play… they were meant to be preparing for their time in the Academy. It was more of a duty. But the three of us never did like the rules." A small smile tugged at his lips. But that soon faded.

"Koschei… he - well, something happened. Anyway, he kind of went off the deep end. Took on the name 'the Master'. He spent the last few hundred years after we left making my life a living hell. The last time I was him was right before the Time War…" he faded off with a haunted look in his eyes.

"And Zeta?" she prompted gently, trying to steer him away from that train of thought. She only hoped that the subject of Zeta was a happier one.

"Well, I guess you could sort of all her my first crush," he smiled. Rose laughed, guessing as much from the dream. "Well, not a crush per se. Time Lords weren't really meant to fall in love. Well, they could, it just didn't happen very often. Those people were often counted as dreamers. Most marriages were arranged. Heck, mine was!" he realised in his babbling what he'd let slip and fell quiet for a moment. When he continued the sadness was back in his voice.

"I lied to her," he said sadly. "That promise I made to her, I broke it." He took a deep breath. "When the children of Gallifrey turned eight, they would be taken for initiation into the Academy. They are made to look into - well, basically it's the Time Vortex. All that knowledge suddenly going through you head… Some people would be inspired, some - like me - would run away… and some would go mad." He took another deep, shaky breath. "They went mad. Both of them. The Master - er, Koschei was mostly alright… well, other than turning into an evil psychopath. But Zeta, I never saw her after I was initiated. She was younger than me so she was initiated later. I was eager to see her after months of waiting. But she never came. After a while, word spread that she was being housed and taught back at her home. It had driven her mad and she wasn't stable enough to be around others. I never saw her again."

"I'm sorry," Rose whispered.

"It's okay, I guess," he sighed running a hand through his hair. "We were still children. I've had 894 years to get over it… Anyway!" he said suddenly bright and chipper again. He jumped off the couch and pulled her up too. "How about a visit to your Mum, eh? See how Pete's settling back in. I didn't give you much of a chance to talk yesterday."

"Really?" she said, surprised he would offer such a thing.

"Yeah."

"Lets go, then!" she grinned.

"Allons-y!" he cried and dragged her to the console room. He wanted to forget his past at the moment. It felt good being able to tell Rose, but he still wanted to forget. A visit to Jackie Tyler was bound to distract him… Although… probably not in a good way.


	3. Imprisoned

**Imprisoned**

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Zeta looked at the plain white walls in disgust. She had painted them only days ago and already it had been taken down. The only room where they didn't take her paintings down was her bedroom. That didn't stop her from trying to ruin this place. She had been held captive here as a child, and now as an adult. Only now there was no escape.

It had been years since she had looked into the Schism. Years since she had last seen her friends. It had been exactly 134 years, three months, twelve days, seven hours, twenty minutes, and 4 seconds since she had last seen her dear Theta (or Theta Sigma as they were calling him at the Academy). And all that time she had been stuck here alone.

When she was younger more people would come in and visit her more often. Her carers, the Matron, her tutors and professors, even the Lord President. She was given a proper Academy education, only she wasn't placed in a Chapter. But now only a few visitors would come. She was mostly taught by just the Matron and Lord President. And she despised them both.

She had thought that insanity had been looking into the Vortex. That was nothing; that was a beautiful song and a lack of memory. These white walls - this prison… That was insanity.

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They say that when she had looked into the Schism, something happened that had never happened before. Energy from the Time Vortex had flown out and taken a hold of her. It had infused herself with its very essence. And she had become a Goddess.

The Vortex was still within her, but it didn't show very often. It only arose in her times of great need. These moments she could never remember. It was like they had been burned from her brain, forbidden. But she would always feel it. There in the back of her mind. The presence of it burnt like the suns. In more ways than one. In one way it was a bright shining reminder of hope as the beautiful Song of Time would dance through her head. But others, it was the raging inferno that set her head a fire and caused her to writhe on the ground, screaming in agony.

Once every year Lord President Drall, the Matron and a few of Gallifrey's highest ranking scientists would come and perform tests on her. They would provoke the Goddess out and see what she could do. They had learnt long ago how to counteract her powers of a Goddess so she was trapped in here. But that didn't stop her from trying to escape.

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Flopping down on her bed she looked around her walls. She had entirely covered everything with paintings, even the roof. They had to give her something to do to stave off true insanity. And so she painted.

So here were her memories, splashed across the walls. The fields of Mount Cadon, the tree that she and Theta would climb. The small brook that ran through the forest where she and Theta would dip their feet and eat the wild berries. She had paintings of herself and Theta and Koschei. One or two of Ushas, their other friend. Paintings of just Theta. Even just one of his bright, mischievous blue eyes… She missed him.

She and Theta had always been closer than she and Koschei. She may go so far as to say he was her crush. Why not, they already thought she was nuts. Already, they believed her to be a dreamer unlike any other Time Lord. She loved him. He was one of the few good things she ever remembered in life. And he had loved how optimistic she was, despite how harsh her childhood had been. It was this that kept her fighting. She had to keep fighting and being the happy optimistic person that Theta had loved.

And that was it. She knew she had to get out of here once and for all. She had to get back to her Theta.

And so began her mission to escape. It was nigh impossible and she was caught every time. And one time she got so far that she had made it outside. They had guards stationed there. They tried to get her back but she just kept running. And they shot her. It was only meant to stop her from escaping. But the man, who had shot her, missed his target. And she was shot in the back, right in between her hearts.

That was the first time she ever regenerated.

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Over the next hundred years she tried all kinds of means of escape. None had succeeded so far. If only she was able to call forth the Goddess at will! Because she was going to get out of here one way or another. Even if it took all her regenerations. And if she died it would be on her terms. She wouldn't let them have the satisfaction of keeping her to rot as their lab rat. Being held safely until they needed her.

And they _would_need her. She had seen it in her dreams. The timelines all lead to it, there was no other course. A fixed point in time. There would come a time in the future when the galaxies would be ravaged with war as the mighty races fought against the Daleks. Gallifrey would burn and become a wasteland. At the end, there were only two paths.

One, a man named the Doctor, so strangely familiar, would end it. But at such a cost. Gallifrey and the Time Lords and the Daleks alike would all be gone. All of it destroyed by his choice. It would end the suffering of billions… but increase the suffering of one, by all that he had saved. It would cost him his spirit and his will and happiness. It would cause a grief so strong no one would be able to save him.

Except one. There, just when he would be about to give up hope, would come a shining star. The light for his darkness. Chasing away the pain and making his life bearable. The small human girl who would save the life of the Last of the Time Lords.

The other choice was just as pleasant, if not even less. She would be brought into the middle of the battlefield. And there she would open up to the Time Vortex, become the Goddess. Time would reverse. Gallifrey and many other fallen civilisations would be restored. The Daleks and any other enemies would ceases to exist. But in the end it would all be for nothing. The Time Lords, corrupt, seeing themselves as Gods to all would use her against the universe, and many other places would fall. In the end, even Gallifrey would come to ruin. She would be the destroyer of reality.

And she couldn't allow that.

**?...DW…?**

The door slid open and Zeta made the first attack. But they had come to expect this and they had her pinned on the ground before the Lord President had even stepped into the room. They stood her up and faced her to him, a guard holding each arm.

"Really, Zeta. We do not have time for this now," he told her sternly.

"What, getting out of here? That's all I have time for."

"Where are your manners child? Is that any way to treat your father's hospitality?"

"You are _not_ my father," she spat at him. He sighed in annoyance.

"As I have said, we don't have time for this. Zeta, we need-"

"No!" she cried fiercely. "I will have nothing to do with your Great Time War!"

"Hmm, Great Time War?" he mused. With horror she realised that he mustn't know about that yet. "We must get the Patrex Chapter to look into that," he said to someone at his side. "But that isn't what I was going to say. Zeta, you have been discovered. If these people got their hands on you things could be very bad. We have to keep you safe and protect you."

"If safety is like this I would rather throw myself right into their arms!"

"You would be better off dead than in their arms."

"Then I take death!" she shouted.

Lord President Drall's face softened. He reached up and grabbed her face gently, but firmly. She tried to flinch away from him, but was unable to move from his grasp. "We cannot afford to take either risk," he said softly.

She felt a jolt run through her body and she realised with horror that his hands were on her temples. Forcefully he broke down the barriers of her mind and triggered something within. She felt a familiar burning sensation and she could feel her ninth body beginning to die. The burning had increased and she could feel Drall trying to shape her.

She was regenerating. He had forced her to regenerate! And he was shaping her into… what?

…'_An__infant__'…_

An infant? He wanted her to be a baby again! Rassilon, no! She couldn't do that. She'd have to wait for all of her abilities to come back again. It would be a full year before she would be able to walk or talk again. She would still have the mind of a 242 year old, but the body of an infant.

Even worse, she'd have to go through puberty a _second_ time! Just what she needed!

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But she barely had time to worry about that as her body regressed into that of a baby's. She shrunk, getting smaller and smaller. The people around her stretching upwards. The two guards who had been holding her steady were reduced to one as she became small enough to hold in their arms. The two guards and Drall held on till she was done, withstanding the burn of her regeneration energy.

When it was over, she was a tiny bundle, her old - now far too big - clothes wrapped around her like a blanket. She didn't even have enough strength in her muscles to keep her own head up, let alone try and sit. Lord President Drall took her in his arms and carried her outside.

"We need to hide you," he told her. "This was the safest way we could think of."

He walked inside a TARDIS and the guards pulled some sort of helmet down from the ceiling. She started to shake when Drall took a fob watch from his robe's pocket. He clicked the watch into the helmet and adjusted it onto her tiny head. She began to cry out in fear. She wanted to scream at them not to do this, that it was inhumane! But all that came from her was a shrill frantic cry. It was the kind of cry that would make a parent genuinely worried and come running.

Then they flicked the switch… and all she felt was pain.

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_**Yeah, so Zeta had a pretty horrible life.**_

_**I read somewhere that Drall was the Lord President when the Doctor was at the Time Lord Academy. And they stay there for a few hundred years. If you don't understand anything here, I suggest looking it up in the Wiki TARDIS files. Great website.**_

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_**Anyway, please review. I do so love reviews!**_


	4. Old Belongings

**Old Belongings**

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"Jackie, if I were you, I would pay very close attention to what I'm saying right now. Because you may never hear me say it again," the Doctor said sternly. "You make _the__BSET_ cup of tea in the universe. And I mean that literally!"

Jackie's mouth popped open into a perfect 'O' of shock, then a grin lit up her face. Rose and Mickey giggled. "Umm, thank you," she said. "Oh, Rose? Would you come and look at something for me?"

"Sure Mum," Rose smiled, rolled her eyes and jumped up to follow her mother.

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It had been a week here since Canary Warf. And in that time a lot had happened. Mickey and Jake had gotten a flat. Pete had talked with Torchwood and twisted their arm. He now had his old identification and his death certificate had been erased from all records. For all legal purposes, he had never died.

And on top of that, he was now the new boss of Torchwood. The old Director had been killed in the mini war. And since he had experience as a Torchwood Director, he managed to get himself in charge. Mickey and Jake worked there too. And Pete had also started up Vitex here. It was just small at the moment. But he had no doubt that in a few moths, it would be taking off.

Oh, and he had already proposed to Jackie.

"It's a little strange, but I would defiantly like her as a daughter," Pete told Mickey and the Doctor as the two women chatted away somewhere else in the house. "I mean, thinking of the other Pete, he was lucky. It - it's not that me and Jackie didn't _want_ kids," he said timidly. "We always used to say that we never had kids because she didn't want to ruin her figure. But the truth is that we just couldn't. She used to get so upset about it that we just started to shrug it off. We thought of adopting, but Jackie didn't want that… It's good to know that here, she got what she wanted."

"They nearly didn't," Mickey said automatically, without thinking.

"Eh?" the Doctor said in confusion.

"Oh… Uh, Gran used to say that they had the same problem. Jackie and Pete never told anyone, but my Gran knew. She used to live just next door before she had to move so she could look after me. She could hear Jackie crying through the walls. But then they went and saw some doctors. And they ended up with Rose. Absolute miracle, they said."

"Not one universe can get it right, can they?" he sighed, echoing what had been said on the parallel universe. "You sure you're going to be alright?" he asked Pete.

"Doctor," he said. "I may be back to square one - well, almost - but I have my Jackie back. I have two great jobs. And a new daughter. If anything I'm beyond okay. And this Jackie - if I must say - is happier than my old Jackie. And what about you?"

"Me?" the Doctor said in surprise. "Me, Rose, the TARDIS, all of time and space, and the smile she gets when she sees it all - Life couldn't get any better." At this Mickey looked at him in amusement. "What?"

"Nothing?"

"_What?_"

"_Nothing!_"

"Mickey," he warned.

"Well, it's just so obvious how much you-" he cut himself short when Rose practically skipped back in the room, a box in her hands. Jackie followed behind her.

"What's that?" he asked, momentarily distracted.

"Some of Dad's old stuff. Him and Mum don't want to keep it, thought I'd like to take a look through it."

"More junk for your room?" he teased.

"Oi! It's not junk! And I doubt you don't have little nick knacks lying about in your room."

"Hold on," Jackie stopped them. "How do you know what her room looks like?" He tried to avoid the death glare she was shooting him. God, that woman could change moods in a millisecond!

"I woke her up when she was having a nightmare, once," he shrugged.

"You give her nightmares?" she cried.

"No, Mum," Rose told her calmly. "The adventures are fine. It, um… it was the same dream as usual."

"Oh," Jackie said quietly.

"Oh?" Pete questioned. Beside him Mickey began to laugh.

"Rose has an irrational fear of plain white walls," he informed Pete.

"It's not irrational!" she cried.

"You should have seen how fast you legged it from Canary Warf!" Mickey continued to laugh. Rose cocked her head in thought a second, reflecting back on that moment. The tightness in her chest and the need to get out of there. She imagined what it looked like from everyone else's point of view… and suddenly cracked up laughing too.

**?...DW…?**

The Doctor smiled at Rose from across the console. They had both enjoyed the visit to her mothers. Jeez, the woman was slowly turning him domestic… well, slightly domestic-ish, and he didn't even give a damn!

She was now sitting cross legged on the floor. The box of her father's old belongings in front of her and two piles either side.

"Right," she said standing up. "This pile," she pointed to the smaller one, "is going to my room. And this one," she pointed to the other pile, "can just be donated or chucked out or something."

The Doctor nodded, then noticed that she'd missed something. "What about that?" he indicated to the pocket watch, still lying unsorted. Rose looked down at it and blinked, before picking it up. She smiled back up at the Doctor… and said nothing. "So, what are you going to do with it?"

"Do with what?" she asked in confusion.

"The watch."

"What watch?"

"The watch in your hands!" he cried incredulously. She looked down at the watch in her hands and blinked in surprise, like she didn't know it had been there.

"How long have I been holding this?" she asked looking back up at him.

"You only just picked it up," he said cautiously. She stared at him blankly.

"Just picked what up?"

"Rose," he walked up to her and looked into her eyes, worry evident on his face. "Could you please give me what it in your hands?" he saw confusion in her eyes.

"There's nothing in my - oh," she gasped, blinking in surprise again. She was looking back at the watch in her hand. "But I - I don't even feel it," she whispered fearfully. She dropped it in his outstretched hand as if it were poison.

The Doctor nodded, taking note of this, and took it from her. He picked up a trophy from beside him and held it in front of her to see, then he hid it behind his back.

"Okay, Rose, what do I have behind my back?" he asked. She looked at him incredulously.

"My Dad's old bowling trophy," she said. The look she was giving him was the usual amused and confused look where he knew she was ever so slightly concerned about his sanity.

"Right," he said and put it back down. He then took the watch and held it blatantly before her eyes. There was no way she could miss it. And indeed, she did look at it, but she seemed rather distracted. He knew she could see it, but her eyes kept wandering and drifting away from it. "Keep looking at this, keep your eye on it," he told her. "Tell me what it is."

"A pocket watch," she said slowly, her tone saying 'isn't it obvious?'

He then hid it behind his back. "Okay then, what do I have behind my back now?"

Rose's eyes lit up with fond annoyance, and she put on a show of thinking. "I don't know, is it… a banana?" He knew her well enough to know that she wasn't acting, her reaction was genuine. She didn't know. A frown creased his face and drew his brows together. Rose saw this and mistook his look of worry for something to do with her not being able to guess correct. "Well, how am I supposed to guess what crazy thing you're hiding? It could be anything in the universe!" she protested.

"This is the strongest perception filter I've ever seen," he murmured taking the watch back out and looking at it. It seemed as if he were really just seeing it now. And indeed he had almost been ignoring it for something so important. A common reaction to the perception filter. But now he knew about it, and he could see it clear as anything. And what he saw made his face drain of all colour. He froze completely and his mind ceased to work for 8.972457 seconds.

"Okay Doctor, what the hell is going on? Are you trying to confuse me…?" suddenly she seemed to notice the state he was in. "Doctor? Are you alright?" Rose asked in concern. He looked so pale and freaked out.

The Doctor didn't reply. He was too busy staring in shock at the fob watch in his hands. It had indents on the back as if it were meant to clip into some sort of machine. And on the front… on the front were the rounded patterns and writings of Gallifrey. It was the identity link to a Chameleon Arch.

"Where did you get this?" was his strained reply.

She looked at it a moment and blinked yet again. "I've never seen it before in my life," she told him, her brow creasing in worry. She had never seen him like this before. The Doctor just stared at her in fear and disbelief. Then he was dancing around the console in a panicked frenzy.

"Erm, Doctor… Where are we going?" she asked, concerned as to the way he was acting.

"Your mothers," he told her. "I need to ask her something." Sensing his urgency, the TARDIS landed him at the Powell Estate in seconds. "Okay, I need to rush ahead. Rose could you grab a book from the library for me? Please, it's important. The TARDIS will show you which one."

"Okay…" Rose stretched the word out. There was no doubt she was questioning his sanity at the moment. Quite frankly, he was too. Shrugging, Rose turned and headed for the library.

.

Before she had time to realise it was a trick, he had dashed outside and locked it with the sonic-screwdriver. He ran up to the door of Jackie's flat and pounded on the frame.

"Alright, alright, hold your horses!" he heard her say from the other side of the door. She opened it and faced the pale, panicked Time Lord. "Doctor!" she said in surprise. She peered around him, looking for her daughter. "Where's Rose?"

"In the TARDIS. I need to speak with you," he pushed his way in, dragging her with him. Jackie looked fearful and concerned when he stopped them forcefully in the middle of the lounge. Pete didn't even look up from the photo album he was poring over. His brow was creased in concern. The Doctor pulled out the watch. "Where did you get this from?" he demanded.

"That's Pete's old pocket watch. He bought it the day Rose was born," she said in bewilderment.

"Speaking of which," the Pete not in question interrupted. "You seem to have missed a few months here… wrong dates too." He continued to flick between the pages of the album. "This photo's marked just before she was born and you're not even showing… Not to mention the wine in your hand!"

"Let me see!" he cried sitting down next to him. His fear and panic were making him harsh and rash. But he didn't care how he was acting. If what he suspected was true, everything would change. If what he was suspecting was true, this would be the best and worst day of his life.

He looked down at one of the photos on the page. Pete and Jackie were curled up on a couch, wines in their hands. They appeared to be at a party. It was dated the day before Rose was born. Pete was right, she wasn't even showing.

The next page over showed the date of Rose's birth... There was nothing, well, nothing of Rose at least. Surely they would have had pictures of their daughter the day she was born. But pictures with her in them didn't crop up for another two weeks. Jackie was grinning and holding a baby Rose. Sure, Rose was absolutely _tiny_, but she looked to be about two or three weeks old at least.

"No, that should be right," Jackie told them. "The old Pete was meticulous with dates. It's probably just a picture in the wrong spot." The two men flicked through the album, but there wasn't a baby bump in sight.

"Jackie," the Doctor said, walking up to her. "Please, this is very, _very_ important, it's about Rose. I need to take a look at some of your memories."

"You what?"

"Look, I'm telepathic, okay?" he said in frustration. "Something is very wrong here and I need to look back at your memories to the day Rose was born."

"Ha! Be my guest, child birth is a bitch," she laughed. "Wait, are you going to be in my mind?"

"Yes, but trust me, I wouldn't do this if it were avoidable."

Finally, after a few death glares and a long calculated look, Jackie nodded. Hesitantly he placed his hands on her temples. He didn't want to go into her mind. Who knew what ghastly things went on in there! But most of all, he didn't want to know the answer to what he might find. It could very well just break him.

He ignored most of the memories; going further back until he came to the day Rose was born. He watched through the memories of Jackie giving birth and she and Pete gushing over their new little girl. He could feel their happiness and relief. And now they could finally tell people. They hadn't wanted to tell anyone until she had been born, just in case she had lost the baby. But the memories felt somehow… false.

He sifted deeper and suppressed a groan as he realised that they were fake memories that had been put into her head. Then, after going deeper and further forward two weeks, he found the real one.

Jackie was upset. She and Pete had been discussing adoption. After all, there was no other option left. The hospital had said they'd send someone around to talk to them, but she wasn't sure if she _did_ want to adopt. Then there came a knock at the door. Slowly she dragged herself up and answered it.

The Doctor gasped out loud when Jackie opened the door to reveal Drall… But that wasn't possible. Drall had been the Lord President when he was at the Academy. What the hell was he doing here, dressed as a human? In his arms was a tiny bundle that he assumed was a baby.

"_Hello," Drall smiled at them. "I'm Mister Xeno Drall. The hospital said you were looking to adopt."_

"_We__'__re__not__looking__for_anything _at__the__moment,__" __Jackie__sniffed__rudely.__She__made__to__close__the__door,__but__he__stuck__his__foot__in__the__way._

"_Oh, but please!" he cried. Jackie opened the door back up in exasperation and before she could protest, Drall and two others stepped in. "Look, this is urgent. We need someone to look after this little girl," he told them holding the bundle up. "Her parents were killed just this morning, she has no other relatives or anyone to look after her. We need someone to look after her for at least a few days. It would be better than sending her to child services." Jackie looked at him doubtfully. "Think of it as a trial run. Take care of her for a few days, if you like her, then adoption is always a possibility."_

"_Who do you think you are, coming in here and demanding that we look after a strange baby?" Jackie cried. Normally she may have gushed over the poor little dear, but she had been through a horrible, emotional day._

_Growling in frustration, Drall handed the baby to one of the men and grabbed Jackie's head in his hands. It was clear he had already reached the end of his patience. She let out a cry as he forced images into her mind and removed the true ones._

"_What the hell are you doing?" Pete shouted angrily. "Leave her alone!" As he jumped up to help his wife, he was grabbed by the other man._

_Drall let Jackie slide to the floor in a dream like state and moved on to Pete. He forced the same kind of images in and removed the others. When Pete fell to the floor beside his wife, Drall placed the fob watch in his hands, and the infant in Jackie's arms._

_And then they left. When the door bang closed they were woken from their daze. And they smiled at each other._

_They looked down at their daughter. Their miracle. Their beautiful little Rose._

.

Jackie was pale and shaking by the time he removed himself from her mind. And so was he. Because his suspicions had just been confirmed, and he felt as if he were about to shatter. How was he going to tell Rose that she was really a Time Lady, that her whole life had more or less been a lie?

"Doctor! Why the hell did you lock me in the TARDIS?" Rose's voice broke them all out of their stupor. She charged through the house, obviously having broken out. They looked up at her in shock (Pete in confusion as he still didn't know what had transpired in Jackie's head). Then Rose froze as she stormed into the room and saw him and her mother looking like they were about to faint. "W-what's wrong?" she asked nervously.


	5. I'm Sorry

**I'm Sorry**

.

.

For a long time Jackie and the Doctor just stared at Rose. Rose looked between the two of them, seeking the answer. He really was at a loss to tell her. There was no gentle or subtle way to put it. No matter what he did, it would still be a huge blow to her. Her mother wasn't really her mother. She wasn't really meant to be human. She had a whole other life. So for once in this incarnation, he was speechless.

Jackie stood, staring at her daughter in horror, fear and even a little bit of disgust. "Who are you?" she hissed, her voice only a whisper.

"Wh-what?" Rose said in shock.

"Who are you and what the bloody hell have you done with my daughter?" Jackie shrieked. Pete looked utterly bewildered. And Rose looked shocked and as if she were going to burst into tears or collapse.

"Jackie," the Doctor muttered a low warning.

"Well?" she continued to blunder on. "Where is my Rose?"

"Jackie, she doesn't know," he tried to urge her to stop.

"Give me my daughter back right now! You took her from me, what ever you are! What kind of alien are you? What did you take her for? Experiments? You better not have fucking taken my daughter for experiments. I swear I'll-"

"You never had a daughter!" the Doctor suddenly exploded, hating seeing the hurt look grow on Rose's face. He froze the second he said it when he realised that would not have helped. Jackie stared at him, pale faced, before bursting into tears. He looked guiltily over at Rose, sadness written across his face.

Rose stood, clutching the doorframe. Her eyes were wide and brimming with tears. She was just as pale as they were now, and he could see her hands shake.

"Rose…" he said gently taking a step towards her.

"Doctor, what the hell are you on about?" her voice shook as much as her hands were. "What's going on?"

"Rose, it's okay," he said soothingly, as if he were coaxing a spooked horse. He reached out to her, but she flinched back a little. Sadly he took out the watch and gave it to her. "Focus on that Rose. Do you hear anything?"

"No," she whispered, her voce cracking.

"That," he stopped and took a deep breath before continuing. "That watch holds a living consciousness. It's Time Lord technology. If a Time Lord had great enough need, they could hook themselves up to this machine on their TARDIS. It could rewrite their biology and turn them human. Their biological DNA and their consciousness get stored into a watch just like this… Do you hear anything?"

Rose stared at the watch for a long time, concentrating; willing herself to hear what he had told her. The Doctor could see the second that the perception filter broke down. Her eyes widened and focussed in on the watch. Then it came, just a whisper. And she dropped the watch in fright. That… that had been _her_ voice.

The Doctor stooped and picked up the watch. Rose was still looking at it as if it were a poisonous wasp - from Vespos - that had just stung her. He could see the pieces falling together in her head.

"No… no," she murmured, shaking her head and taking a step back. She nearly collapsed and he quickly moved to catch her, making sure she was mostly steady on her feet. "No, but I'm human," she said adamantly, there was a touch of hysteria to her voice. "I was born the 23rd of June, 1986. M-my mother is right there!"

Gently he placed the watch back in her hands. Tears had welled up in his eyes too. "Rose, your mother can't have kids," he said softly, he didn't want to hurt her as he knew he was doing. "She never could… Her memories of your birth aren't real. They were put there by someone when you were… given to her." He winced at the last part, unable to hell her exactly what had transpired; that she had really been forced onto Jackie.

"No!" she cried hysterically. "I'm not, I can't be! I'm her daughter!"

"No you're not," Jackie retorted venomously. "I don't even know _what_ the hell you are!"

"Jackie!" the Doctor growled, glaring at the woman.

Rose felt as if she had been punched in the stomach. A second later a sob escaped her lips and she pressed her hand to her mouth, closing her eyes tight. She couldn't stand the way everyone was looking at her. Especially Jackie; the way Jackie was looking at her made her unable to breathe. Tears finally falling, she ran from the room.

"Rose!" the Doctor called after her, but she was already gone. Before he went to follow after her, he rounded on the woman behind him. "What the hell are you doing?" he shouted at her. "She's your _daughter_!"

"No she's not!"

"_Yes_ she is!" he cried. "She may not be your child by birth, but she is still your daughter. Who is it that you would tuck into bed at night and read stories to, and take to school, and care for? Who is it that even when you're upset with one another, you would still do anything for her? Who is it that you _beg_ me to keep safe, every time we leave? Who is it that you love unconditionally? Who is the most important person in your life?"

Tears running down her face, Jackie fell weakly, sitting on the couch. "Rose," she whispered.

"Exactly. And Rose Tyler will always be your daughter, until the second she opens that watch."

And with that, he stormed from the house.

**?...DW…?**

The TARDIS seemed eerily quiet. There was no noise in any of the rooms. Even the TARDIS herself didn't seem to be humming.

Rose wasn't in the console room, or her bedroom. He had searched for nearly ten minutes before he found her in the Library, sitting on the couch they had slept on. Her eyes were red and her cheeks stained with tears. She didn't even look up when he came in.

"So my whole life is a lie?" she asked emptily.

It was a full minute before he could reply. He let out a huge puff or breath and moved over to sit next to her. He saw that she was still holding the watch in her hand.

"Not a lie exactly," he said. "The fact that Jackie it your birth mother, maybe. But not your life. You've lived as a human since you were a baby, surrounded by people who love you because they wanted to, not because they believe they did."

"She hates me," she whispered brokenly. He instantly knew she was talking about Jackie.

"She doesn't hate you," he told her. "She didn't mean it. She was just in shock. I mean, she just found out that not only is her daughter not really hers, but also that said daughter is meant to be an alien."

"And what about me!" she cried. "I _am_ said daughter! I just found out that my mother isn't really my mother and that _I_ am not really meant to be human. That I'm… that I'm what? A - a Time Lord?"

"Yeah," he let out yet another deep breath. It was a lot to take in. And it was breaking his hearts.

"So… if I open this watch, I'm going to become a Time Lord like you?" He nodded sombrely. "So if I open this watch… you wont be the last anymore… you wont be alone."

"No!" he cried startling her. "And I don't mean 'no, I wont be the last anymore', I mean 'no, I'm not letting you open it'!"

"What? Why?" she cried in surprise.

"Because I don't know who is in that watch. For all I know you could have been changed after your birth or you could have a whole other past. A whole other life, memories, family, loved ones, even a different personality."

"So I'm not allowed to know who I used to be?" she said starting to sound angry. She rose up out of the chair to glare down at him.

"No! Because the only way to find out who you were is by opening the watch, and by then it will be too late," he said with a hard voice.

"And what would be wrong with that?" she said in angered exasperation. "I'll be a Time Lord. I'll live as long as you will. You won't be the last and you won't be alone! I can give you forever just like I promised. And besides, the watch is me! I have the right to know who I was! So why can't I open it, Doctor? Well, Why?"

"Because I don't want to lose you!" he shouted standing up so he was only a breath away from her. "The second you open that watch you won't _be_ Rose Tyler anymore. Rose Tyler will be dead. This life will just be a dream. A memory with no emotion attached. You may be someone completely different to who you are now. I refuse to let you open that watch. I love you! And I would rather be the last of my kind forever than lose you!"

Rose stared at him speechlessly. She wasn't sure what she was more shocked at, what he had told her about opening the watch… or saying - well, more like yelling - that he loved her. She opened her mouth, but no words came. She wanted to tell him that she loved him too. But she was still so in shock that she was frozen. So much had happened in such a short time. It was overwhelming and she wasn't sure if she would be able to take anymore.

As it was, the emotional stress had already exhausted her completely. Her legs began to buckle beneath her, but the Doctor saw what was happening and caught her immediately. He took the watch from her rather limp hand and slipped it into his pocket. He then swept her up in his arms, bride style, and carried her away. She clung weakly to him, arms around his neck.

He walked down the corridor to her room; she was a little too numb at this point to be surprised when he turned, not into her room, but the door opposite hers. She was taken into a room of rich colours, all cream and brown with accents of reds and gold. Everything around the room looked well used. It was littered with nick knacks and trinkets that she had never seen before and for all she knew could have been there for hundreds of years. There were a few desks covered in papers and gadgets. And in the centre of the room, was a large, soft looking, and hardly used bed.

He lay her down on this and coaxed her out of her uncomfortable over-vest. He made her as comfy as he could, then lay beside her, pulling her into him. She still hadn't said a word and that was starting to worry him. Her eyes were glazed over and distant. It was like the true shock had only just settled in. Gently and carefully, he lifted a hand to caress her cheek.

She finally responded to him by leaning into his hand as a small smile flickered across her face. Letting out a soft breath of relief he leant over and kissed her head. Rose rolled over so she was facing him, and curled into him, seeking comfort. His arm tightened around her.

"I'm not going anywhere," he told her. "I promise." And he really wasn't going to leave her. Not until she had forgotten all about the watch. He couldn't afford to lose her, it would shatter him. "I'm so sorry," he whispered into her hair.

A small sob escaped her lips and her head tilted up, stealing a quick desperate kiss. He didn't try to push it further, nor did he push her away. He just let her take comfort from him however she could. She buried her face in his shoulder and he held her close.

An hour later Rose finally stopped shaking and her breathing steadied. The Doctor knew that she was asleep. But he wouldn't leave, and he wouldn't even move, nor fall asleep. He would watch over her and keep her safe. He remembered reading long ago that sometimes the voices from the fob watches could be very persuasive. He didn't care that he had hidden it in his very deep pockets, he was going to make sure that it stayed well away from her. He would keep his Rose Tyler safe from anything and everything… even herself.

He was awake for hours, just watching the beautiful woman in his arms sleep. Knowing how much shock and pain she must be in made him incredibly sad and somewhat guilty. If only he hadn't pursued the meaning of the watch, if only he had left well enough alone.

As the seconds, minutes and hours wore on he felt his eyes droop. Time Lords might not need as much sleep as humans, but they still needed at least an hour every night. And by now it had been over thirty-six hours since he had last slept. Usually that would be fine, even humans could pull that! But the damn song that was drifting to him, a lullaby hummed by the TARDIS, so subtle he barely noticed. Soon his eyes closed, and he too drifted off.

**?...DW…?**

Rose woke to the sound of echoed whispers. The whispers filled her head, talking her. The voice told her of a long happy life and being free. Everything the voice said was so tempting. She had a feeling that it was the voice from the watch… but the Doctor told her to leave it alone. But as much as she couldn't see the watch before, she could see it equally as much now. So it was almost all she could think about.

"_Rose_," her voice whispered from somewhere by the Doctor. "_I__am__you.__I__am__Rose__Tyler.__Please,__I__'__m__sick__of__being__trapped.__If__you__love__him,__open__the__watch.__"_

And that did it. She looked up at the gorgeous sleeping Time Lord who held her to him protectively, and knew that she had to do it. Careful not to wake him, she slipped her hand around and into his pocket. She barely had to search for it, it was almost as it were magnetised to her hand and it was suddenly there. She drew it out and looked at it. The voice was stronger now, but it was less insistent now it knew her intentions.

She held the watch behind her back, and with her free hand she reached up and caressed his cheek. At her touch his eyes fluttered open and a small smile tugged at his mouth… then he saw the expression on her face.

"Rose?" he murmured. She was leaning over top of him, looking down at him with a sad smile.

"I love you," she whispered. Then she leant down and kissed him. It was long and soft and passionate. He responded eagerly, kissing her gently but none the less passionately. Both were trying to convey all their love in that one kiss. When Rose drew back, she had tears in her eyes. "I'm sorry," she whispered, her voice cracking.

And then she opened the watch.


	6. Stranger

**Stranger**

.

.

She felt it as yet again her biology changed. It didn't hurt like last time, which she found strange as her every single cell was changing. She should be burning, and yet she wasn't. But suddenly she had two hearts and not one. She could feel her mind expanding, her memories all coming back to her. Her past as the girl known as Zeta.

Yet it was strange. She had read in the accounts that it was like waking from a dream. That there would be no attachment to any human memories. That she would feel and act different.

…And it could be because she had only just regenerated into an infant when she had been changed, but she didn't feel any different at all. It was like she had become a different species… but she remained the same person. She didn't feel like she had woken from a dream. It was more like she had remembered lost memories, and that was it. She was still Rose Tyler.

She realised that it must have been the TARDIS that had changed her. Drall had been in a hurry. He hadn't set it properly. And the TARDIS, knowing she had been forced against her will, gave her a chance. A chance to be who she really was and remain so after. She had never been so thankful of a single creature in all her long life.

And then she gasped as she realised another thing. The man before her, the man she loved… the Doctor, was her Theta. The same boy who had kept her hope alive for 234 years. The one person she cared about most in all of space and time.

Suddenly she had wrapped herself around his waist as tears slid down her face. "Oh, my Doctor! My Theta!" she cried in delight and relief. She was safe. She could hardly believe that the universe had been kind enough to give him back to her! And she had unknowingly been travelling with him for the last two years! Giving her more of a chance to fall for him.

Her happiness was shattered as he finally spoke. "Who are you?" he asked in a strained voice. His body beneath hers was stiff and unresponsive.

"Rose," she told him. "I'm still Rose." She should tell him who she was. But she wanted him to know her as Rose first and foremost. She didn't want him keeping her _just_because she was his long lost friend. She wanted him to know that she was the woman he loved. So until he realized that, she wouldn't tell him. Besides, she hated the name Zeta. The Doctor had never truly called her by that name as a child. He had called her by her real name, but that had been wiped from his memory and replaced with Zeta. She had never actually herd him call her Zeta before. The only people, who had really called her that, were people she despised. It was her prison name.

"No, you're not," he said gruffly, pain evident in his voice. He took her by the shoulders and held her back from him. A hurt scowl flitted across his face. "My Rose died when she opened that watch." The pain and anger grew on his features as he glanced down that the watch in her hands. "Now tell me who you are."

"I'm Rose," she insisted.

"No. You're. _Not_!" his yell was hissed through his clenched teeth. "Tell me who the hell you are!"

"No!" she said childishly wriggling from his grip and glairing at him. "I am Rose. Somehow the change was different and I'm _still_ the same. And until you realise that, I'm not going to tell you the name you would know me as."

"So, I know you then?" his voice still angry.

"For far too short a time for my likes, but yes." Tiredly she fell back against the pillows. As she realised yet another thing, a small smile flitted across her face. "I'm free," she whispered.

The Doctor tried to reign in his anger. First this woman replaced his Rose. Then she tries to torture him further by saying she _was_Rose. Now she has the gall to be glad that she was free of the watch, when if she really _was_ still Rose, then she wouldn't worry about being free!

"So," he said grudgingly, realising he would get no where by asking the same question to someone who was probably just as stubborn as Rose had been. He was stuck with her, he had to at least try and be civil. "How old are you?"

"I should be as old as you," she told him. "But we seem to have gotten out of sync. Including human years, I'm only 263… Wow, and you thought you were bad with regenerations!"

"Sorry?" he said.

"You're on your tenth incarnation right? Me too. Nine regenerations in 100 years… that's got to be some kind of record, right?"

"You lost nine regenerations in 100 years!" he cried aghast. "What the hell did you do?"

Rose didn't answer for a very long time, and she felt the Doctor becoming more agitated. "I ran," she whispered, not quite willing to tell him what had happened to her yet. "Doctor?" she rolled over to face him. He was still sitting up, ridged and staring off at the wall with a hurt scowl. "How many years have you been happy?"

This seemed to take him by surprise and he looked at her and blinked. "What?"

"How many years have you been happy? My guess would be hundreds. You've been running freely through time and space for so long now. And that makes you happy. I bet that even the years that you've been _truly_ happy couldn't be counted on your hands." He looked at her, confused as to where this could be going. She took a deep breath and let it out as she closed her eyes. "Twenty-six. That's how many years I've been happy. And I've only ever been truly happy for seven." She didn't tell him that those seven years were the years she had been with him. From the day she had met him when she was three years old, to the day she was locked up, and the last two years with him. She had never felt so happy in her life. And she had lived 237 years of hell.

"You're 263 and you've only been happy for twenty-six years! What did you do the rest of the time?"

This time Rose didn't answer at all. She didn't want to talk about it. She didn't want to tell him just yet. And if she kept on talking, he was bound to figure it out. And she knew what he as like, even if his hearts were breaking, he was still curious enough to ask questions all day. And if she couldn't convince him that she was Rose, it was best to leave him to his thoughts.

Sighing, she got up off his bed and walked to the door. She placed a hand on the handle and looked back. He still looked upset and angry, but he now had that curious light in his eyes. He wanted know the answers.

"Drall wasn't the man you thought he was," she told him. "I would never even wish pain on anyone… but I'm glad he's gone."

The last thing she saw as she opened the door and walked out was the Doctor blinking in surprise. But then, just as she stepped out, another thought occurred to her. Such a horrid thought that it froze her in place and clenched her hearts painfully.

"Doctor?" she said quietly, slipping back inside.

"Yes?" He still hadn't moved.

"Y-you're not… are you going to leave me behind somewhere?" Tears welled in her eyes at the thought. Memories of him telling her that he wouldn't leave her. 'Not you' he had said. And the day she had promised him forever. Perhaps now that he thought she wasn't Rose he would want her gone. After all, she did look just the same as his 'lost love'. But that was because she was the same. She _was_ Rose Tyler. She just needed to stick around long enough to show him that.

"No," he said flatly and just as quietly. His head was lowered and he refused to look at her. "No, you may not be her anymore, and you look so the same that the reminder is painful, but I'm not going to leave you. You wouldn't have anywhere to go, but despite that, you're my responsibility. You're stuck travelling with me for however long we have."

"Not all bad then," she tried to joke. But it failed miserably when the lump in her throat chocked up her words. And she fled the room before he could see the tears fall.

.

Responsibility. He saw her as a responsibility!

She ran back to her room and jumped on the bed. Despite the fact she'd had a few hours sleep already, she was exhausted. And she was still emotionally drained from the fight with her mother, now added to that with what had just happened. She was about ready to drop. And that was saying something. When she had been trapped in Drall's homes, she had sometimes gone weeks without sleep… Not really the best plan when you were trying for an impossible escape.

She tried to sleep, but despite how exhausted she was, she just couldn't. She'd nearly drift off, but then she would remember the Doctor's expression when she had opened the watch and burst into tears. How was she going to convince him who she was, without giving away who she had been?

It was easy for him when he had regenerated; he just had to tell her some memories and then be his usual heroic self. But she was supposed to have all her human memories, and even if her personality had turned out different she would still have some of the same traits. He could never really believe it was her.

At this she began to cry even more.

She felt a nudging at the back of her mind, and a humming filled the room. She smiled as the TARDIS tried to comfort her.

"You knew all along didn't you?" she sniffed. The TARDIS let out a hum that could only be described as guilty. "I knew you liked me for a reason," she laughed. "And you knew I would be me after didn't you? That's why you wanted me to open the watch." Another affirmative hum. "So will you help me convince him?" The TARDIS gave an eager hum and Rose knew that she would do anything to help.

She wanted her Time Lord to be happy. And what made him happy was Rose. They just had to make him see that his Rose was still there… somehow.

**?...DW…?**

The crash rung through the room as the chair broke against the wall. Fiercely, he rubbed the tears from his eyes. He had never felt so broken, not even after the Time War.

And he couldn't even find it in himself to blame Rose. She had wanted to open it so he wouldn't be alone. He had known what those watches were like. He shouldn't have fallen asleep! Maybe then she would still be with him.

The TARDIS gave him a mental nudge. He got the gist. "What do you mean she's still here?" he said angrily. "That is not Rose, not anymore. That is a stranger in her body! She won't even tell me her name!" The TARDIS gave an angry hum. "No, she's not Rose!" he shouted in reply.

He stopped short when he felt another mental nudge, but it wasn't the TARDIS this time. It was the Time Lady. It startled him at first, he wasn't used to having anyone there anymore, but there she was. Another Time Lord presence in his mind, it had been so long since there was anyone else. Suddenly his mind didn't feel so lonely.

He had to try and stop the smile that threatened to tug the corners of his mouth. He succeeded when he realised what the nudging meant. No, she wasn't trying to communicate with him. It was her emotions. Her emotions right now were so strong that they were pushing through to anything that was even slightly telepathic. Her grief…

Well of course she was grieving. She had just woken up from being human for 21 years. And found that, not only had she technically skipped 639 years - But she was forced to travel with the man who had destroyed her home and people.

Yet oddly mixed with the grief was pure joy. For some reason she was exceedingly happy…

He could hardly blame this stranger, it wasn't her fault either. But she was more of a mystery than _he_ was. He just wished he knew who she was.

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_**This one is a little short. But yeah, hopefully it's good. This is the part where my definite ideas start running out. But I still have my base line. Oh well, I'm sure you'll forgive me when (if) I write my next 'definite' idea in the next chapter. We'll see if it fits.**_

_**Anyway, hope you liked it!**_


	7. Stir Crazy

**Stir Crazy**

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The Doctor sighed in frustration. He had tried to put up with the Time Lady. He really did. And he was sticking by what he'd said; he wasn't going to abandon her. She and the TARDIS were the only things he had left of Gallifrey.

But it was just so hard when he saw her skipping around just as Rose had. He had read of cases where the Time Lord personality was very similar to the human, but he didn't think it could be this close. Her personality was so similar it was painful. But he knew it wasn't her. Because he would look in her eyes and behind the familiar happiness and cheeky grin he could see the deep sadness that came from hundreds of years of being hurt. He wondered what had happened to her for all those years.

It frustrated him to no end that she hadn't told him her name yet. She was even doing her hardest not to drop hints. All he knew about her was that he had known her for a short time, short by human standards apparently. He didn't know hat to call her. He had tried calling her Lady (just cutting off the 'Time' part of 'Time Lady'… wow he would sound _really_ pretentious if someone did that to him!). But every time he called her something other than Rose, he would get a full on glair, the kind he'd only seen when Rose had been protective of him. The death glare she would give their enemies. It made a shiver run down his spine. He did like being on the receiving end for once. But he still refused to call her Rose. Because she wasn't.

To make matters worse, it had been a full week and they hadn't left the TARDIS. He hadn't bothered to move them from the Time Vortex. He didn't run around the console with his usual ecstatic attitude. He_would_ say that 'Time Lords don't mope!'… But yeah, he was moping. And since they hadn't even left the TARDIS, because he was trying to keep an eye on her - find out who she was, he was starting to go stir crazy!

.

Rose groaned as she flopped down on her bed. She had tried all week to convince him it was her. She had tried talking to him, but he wouldn't really talk back. She'd never seen him this quiet before, not even in his last incarnation. When he did talk, he called her anything but Rose.

He had changed from what he had been. He wasn't quite so happy and bubbly anymore, and when he was, it was quite clear that it was to cover up the pain. It was like part of him had died with her - Rose's supposed - death.

She could tell that sometimes when she was around, that he was trying to keep down the anger and sorrow. But she could see it. Once when she'd said something that was so _her_, she was so sure he would finally see… Instead he glared at her with the expression she'd come to know as the Oncoming Storm. She recoiled from the glare, horrified he'd used it on her.

She was glad that he avoided her as much as he could, though. She needed less sleep again now, but she still got in a few hours every night. And every night she would have the same dream, that she was trapped back in the white walled prison of Drall's country home. She would wake up screaming and whimpering. Because she was scared that she would wake up and find that the last twenty-one years had been the dream. She was glad that he wasn't near enough to hear her.

It really didn't help that they hadn't left the TARDIS in a long time. Don't get her wrong, Rose loved the TARDIS. Even before Satellite 5 she'd had an unusually strong bond with her, one to rival the Doctor's. Then after the Bad Wolf incident, it became even stronger. She'd once again become part of the Time Vortex, and part of the TARDIS at the same time. Now that she was a Time Lady again, it was as strong as it could be. If the bond became any stronger, she would actually be able to hear the TARDIS _talk!_

But staying inside the TARDIS was the last thing they needed at the moment. Being in there so long was starting to drive the both of the stir crazy. They needed to get out. They needed a distraction… And maybe if they were distracted long enough, he would forget that she had changed and see her for who she really was.

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Sensing her thoughts, the TARDIS set the co-ordinates and shook as she sent herself into the vortex.

"What's going on?" Rose cried running into the console room. The Doctor was already there, working furiously on the controls to no avail.

"I don't know," he replied. "She's moving all on her own." It was seconds later that they landed. And they both just stared at the door. Then they looked at each other, curiosity burning in their eyes. Rose grinned at him cheekily with her tongue in teeth grin and slowly backed towards the door.

It seemed to work for a moment. When he looked at her, he wasn't filled with sadness or anger, just a familiar grin of happiness plastered on his face. But the longer he looked at her, the more his eyes clouded over as he remembered what he sometimes all too easily forgot - or chose not to remember.

Rose's smile faded a little, but it didn't deter her. "Come on, Doctor," she pleaded. "You're going to drive us crazy here. The TARDIS is doing us a favour. I love her, and I don't want her becoming another prison to me." At the mention of '_another_' prison, the Doctor's head cocked to the side in worry and curiosity. She had to cover it quickly. "Please?" she went on. "I'm already half mad, do you really wanna push me over the edge?" she grinned. "And besides, strange new place… No idea what's out there… only one way to know…" she enticed. She could see by his face that he was slowly succumbing to the curiosity.

"Oh, alright, let's go," he grinned. He ran forward, taking her hand as he pulled her out the door. The second they were outside, he realised what he was doing and dropped her hand.

Rose sighed. This was going to be harder than she thought.

**?...DW…?**

The TARDIS filled with laughter as the two Time Lords burst back into the console room, having only _just_narrowly missed the sticky ball of alien goop that would have pinned them to the ground. As it was, they both had spatters of it in their hair, and wide grins on their faces.

Rose had been right, the deeper into the adventure they had gotten, the more he seemed to forget. At one point he had almost even called her 'Rose'. He had been introducing them to the local aliens… but apparently he'd offended them a few regenerations ago and couldn't go by 'Doctor'.

So he'd said: _"__I__'__m__John__Smith,__and__this__is__my__companion__Ro-__"_

_When he hadn't said anything further for an awkwardly long time, she had to jump in. "Z," she told them. "My name's Z."_

"_Yes!" the Doctor sprung to life again. "Zee Smith!"_

He had intended it to sound as if she were his sister… So you can imagine his awkward, baffled reaction when they had presumed she was his wife. He probably should have introduced her as his _companion_. It turns out that he really just _can__'__t_ learn, because in his reaction, he'd made the same mistake her had last time. And the next thing they knew they were running from the lady of the house, who had a horrible talent to stick people to walls with her sticky goop stuff. It's a good thing she didn't get them, because she was not happy.

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"And did you see her face!" Rose gasped out through her laughter. She was just too glad that he was acting normally again. So much to the fact that she had forgotten to censor out some of the things that would make him suspect who she really is. "God, she was worse than Matron!"

The Doctor stopped laughing and looked at her quizzically. "Who?" he asked.

"One of the teachers at my school," she said, not lying… just bending the truth. "You know, really strict sorta woman?"

"Yeah, I know the type," he laughed remembering the woman who had looked after Zeta… "Hey, were did the name Zee come from?"

"I had a mind blank… for some reason I could only think of the alphabet. Z was the first letter I thought of that sounded like a name."

"And you didn't think to say R- you didn't say Rose?" he tried again, his voice slightly darker. Rose knew that the reason she hadn't said it was that she was afraid he'd get upset or angry at her. But like always, she was one to look on the positive side.

"We were _undercover!_" she teased. "Couldn't used my own name." she said this last part under her breath, but the Doctor still heard her.

Instantly his face dropped and darkened. "It's not your name," he said flatly. And then, without another word, he left the room.

"Gahh!" Rose cried in frustration, flopping down in the pilot seat. She had been so close! There were times that she'd been sure that he knew it was really her. But then he turned around and said things like that. And god, did she know how to shut her mouth? Why didn't she just scream 'I'm Zeta' at him!

She was tired and sad and lonely. She dearly loved the TARDIS, but she needed to talk to someone. Someone who could talk back. And she could pretend for just a while that everything was normal again.

Making her mind up, Rose stood and started pressing buttons on the console.

**?...DW…?**

Yeah, maybe flying the TARDIS wasn't exactly the smart thing. She was feeling really guilty now and quite bad for the Doctor and the TARDIS. She had never had the chance to actually learn _how_ to fly a TARDIS. Sure she'd read the theory back _long_ before her ninetieth birthday - back when she still hoped they may _let_ her out.

It turned out that the theory was quite different to the practical. Especially when the books she'd learnt from were of a much later model than the T40. She'd crash landed in the ally, only just managing to keep them the right way up. The TARDIS was mostly alright, a little ruffled, but understanding. The Doctor, however, was currently lying unconscious in the Library.

She'd made sure to make him comfortable before she'd stepped outside and headed up to her mum's flat.

Jackie had been surprisingly overjoyed to see her. She'd instantly pulled her inside, into a hug and sobbingly apologised for what she'd said last time. She didn't even suspect that Rose had already opened the watch… not that she would know what that was supposed to mean anyway.

They had been talking for nearly an hour now. At the back of her mind, Rose was slightly worried about how the Doctor was. Surely he should have woken up by now. But she loved being able to talk normally with someone who believed it was her. Albeit the fact that they skirted around the subject of the watch. She was so happy to know that Jackie loved her no matter what. And every time she said her name, Rose had to suppress the huge grin that threatened to engulf her face.

Those grins were quickly wiped away when the door banged open and she and Jackie turned to face the Oncoming Storm. The Doctor stood in the doorway, a near murderous glare marring his handsome face. Practically growling, he stormed over to her, grabbed her roughly by the wrist and dragged her from the room, ignoring Jackie's shouts and protests. He all but threw her into the TARDIS and slammed the door behind them.

"What the _hell_ do you think you were doing?" he thundered.

"I was visiting my mother!" she said strongly, refusing to back down or be intimidated.

"She is not your mother."

"Says the man who only a week ago told me that she would always be my mother!" she laughed darkly with incredulity. "She's my mother and I have every right-"

"She is _not_ your mother! She is Rose Tyler's mother!" he shouted at her.

"I _am_ Rose Tyler!" she all but screamed. "Why can't you see that? Everyone else can! The TARDIS can see it; Mum and Pete could see it! I bet that even Mickey would know it was me. Everyone but you! Why are you being so fucking _stubborn?_"

The screaming match only lasted five minutes before she snapped. She could feel the fog clouding into her mind, the paranoia and the madness, swirling about in her head. This was one of the ways they did it. They would hurt and taunt her till she wanted to retreat, till the Vortex sensed that she needed help. But it wouldn't always just take over like 'that'. It would usually only take her over if she endured the madness first.

"Doctor, stop," she whispered. She wasn't sure if he heard her through the yelling, he didn't stop. Her hands clenched into fists at her side as she began to shake violently. "Doctor, please stop," she said a little louder. He didn't take much notice… and her mind shattered.

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The Doctor stopped shouting when she let out a cry that was too painful and wild to be anger or frustration. He finally stopped pacing angrily about enough to see that she was shaking like an under-clothed human in Antarctica. Her hands were clutched to her head and when he saw her eyes, he saw that they were slowly misting over with gold.

"No, no, noooo!" she moaned. "Please stop. Stop, don't. Help me, help me, let me out!" her sentences were short and sharp and disjointed… like that of someone who had lost their mind. "Hope: red hills, silver tree, turquoise brook. Paints. Theta. Flower. Promise. Escape. Have to get out. Let me out." Her movements were quick and erratic. She didn't stop shaking and the gold mist never left her. All he could do was stare in shock as his friend came undone before him. Slowly, her broken form slid to the floor.

"He promised. He promised. He promised. He doesn't know. Can't find me. Lost, lost, lost. Little girl lost. Theta, Doctor, Theta, Doctor. Love. Safe. Find Theta. Must get back to Theta. Get out, get out, LET ME OUT! Trap, trap, trap. Trapped here. Alone here. Dark here. Dark, dark, white. I am gone. No more me. No one cares. Theta cares. Theta gone."

"No, no, I'm here," he said as comfortingly as he could, considering he was in shock. He knelt down beside her and cradled her in his arms as she muttered. "It's okay. Look I'm here. It's me, Theta. I've got you."

"Must get back. Must get out. Lonely. Trapped. Gone. Gone, gone, gone. Past, present future. Will be. Won't be. Can't be. Stop them. Stop me. Help me! Time and ash. Gold everywhere. Gold, gold, gold. I am gold. I am Goddess. I am Rose. Rose. Flower. Human. Happy. Happy human. Loved human. Love is good. Want it back. Lack. Flack. Pack. Rack. Sack. Tack. Whack. Quack. Hack. Knack. Zack. Jack. Miss Jack. Crack. Crack my hearts. Wrong - break. Break my hearts, break at once. Shakespeare. Death. No more. Don't kill me. No more kill me!"

"I won't let anyone hurt you."

"234 years. Three months. Twenty-two days. Nine hours. Thirty-six minutes. 31.463 seconds. Theta gone. Lost time." She giggled hysterically. "Little lost Time Lady lost time!"

"Theta's here!" he cried, holding back the tears. It was painful to see her like this. "See, I'm here. I've got you now. You're going to be okay."

"He promised. Time lines too strong. Take me away."

"Anywhere you want," his quiet voice cracked.

She looked up at him with wide, crazed and desperate gold eyes. "Theta," she whispered. "Save me."

"Forever," he whispered back.

At that she sagged in his arms. Curled up in a ball. And wept.

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_**Insanity is fun. Just ask the Master… Though, I don't think Rose / Zeta would agreeeeee. It really was quite fun writing this scene despite the slightly depressive nature of it.**_

_**I think at this point the Doctor knows in his hearts that she is Rose, he just won't let himself admit it because it's too painful if he's wrong. Just like he would usually refuse to say he loves her when she's human.**_

_**Something a little more shocking coming up. So hold on to your celery sticks!**_

_**Reviews. Reviews. Reviews. I like reviews. Need reviews. Reviews keep me sane. We want me sane. Sane is good. Bad. Bad good. Good bad. Neeeeeed reviews! Yay!**_


	8. The Path that Never Was

_**Re-updating this one. Just tried something to get rid of the annoying run on italics. Hopefully now they're gone. I have no idea why it does that.**_

* * *

><p>.<p>

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**The Path that Never Was**

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Rose didn't stop crying for at least ten minutes. And the Doctor never let her go. He just couldn't do that to someone who used to be Rose. Someone who was so sweet, and kind, and happy… and secretly broken.

He had known she was putting on a brave face pretending that things were still alright between them, that he wasn't treating her like and absolute jerk. But he had no idea how much her old life had scarred her. He had seen the pain in her eyes and dismissed it as proof she was different. But seeing her breakdown like that had frightened him. And from what he could tell it was only from arguing.

And the things she had said. Something about being trapped. A promise. She wanted help, to be saved. She wanted him. How did she know him? he remembered when she told him she'd only ever had twenty-six happy years… he had a sinking feeling most of those were her human years.

But that was impossible, because she didn't have any emotional attachment to any of those memories. Which was why he was angry at her for seeing Jackie. It wasn't right to torment Jackie when the memories of her meant nothing to the Time Lady. Though, from what he could understand of her life - which he knew nothing about - she did not have a good time at all. Perhaps even no love. So it was almost understandable that she would go to the one person she remembered loving her the most… No, no that wasn't it. Of course she had a good life. Gallifrey may have been strict, but everyone was treated well…

A memory surfaced in his mind of his dear friend Zeta being dragged back home screaming. He had never understood why she didn't want to go home, not truly. She never told them much of went on there, sometimes he thought she was exaggerating. But he could remember the look of pure fear and hatred in her usually sweet eyes and it sent chills down his spine. That look would haunt him forever because it was so heartbreaking. And it was such a shock. Zeta had been the sweetest person he had ever known (other than Rose). She would never even consider hating anyone… but the look in her eyes when she looked at her Matron…

.

"Thank you," Rose's strained husky voice broke through his reverie.

"For what?" he asked quietly.

"For stopping me. For talking me out of it. No one's ever done that before," she told him.

"What? Not once? You have a breakdown and no one helped you? Wait, this has happened before?"

Rose shook her head into his chest. "I looked into the Schism and I went mad," she whispered. "And they wanted it. They wanted me to go mad. Because if I retreat… it takes over…" She couldn't repress the shiver that ran through her. She didn't mind having the Vortex within her. But hundreds of years of torturing it out of her had tainted her views of it. She never turned to it unless absolutely necessary. And she hated that she had no control over it. she couldn't even call if fourth at will, nor stop it.

The Doctor was concerned by the last part. He was worried about anything that could drive someone mad and take them over. He didn't ask what it was… strangely for him, he didn't want to know. "Mmm, the Untempered Schism," he murmured, sending the conversation in another direction as he helped her up. "Can't say I'll miss that."

"I can't say I'll miss anything… Well, maybe the view," she said wandering around the other side of the console.

"What?" he cried in surprise.

"Doctor, I'm sorry, but there was never really much for me to miss. I only got to enjoy the sight of Gallifrey for five years before…" she faded out, leaving him looking at her curiously again. She didn't like thinking of her imprisonment, she was so overjoyed to finally know that she was free. "I'm actually glad you did it," she said quietly.

It didn't take long for him to know what she meant. "What?" he cried incredulously, anger seeping into his voice. "How could you say that? How could you be _glad_ that I destroyed our home and everyone you loved, everyone that ever cared for you?"

"No one cared for me!" she shouted at him. "No one! I'm starting to wonder if _you_ ever did! You didn't even come to see if I was okay! You left me trapped while I tried to fight my way back to you! You promised!" she tried to fight the tears as she voiced the thoughts that had been nudging at the back of her mind for a while now. "I was taken away from my parents when I was a few months old because I was - am - somehow strong enough to not only _see_, but strong enough to _bend_ the timelines! I can see the options that time gives and help it go down the path I want. The people who took me didn't care for me, I was only their tool. A weapon they could shape! Then to make matters worse, when I looked into the Untempered Schism I became eternity. I somehow absorbed the time Vortex. Almost like I did on Satellite 5."

The Doctor looked at her in shock - well, even more shock than he had a second ago. "Oh, come on," she scoffed at his incredulous look. "Did you honestly think that just _any_ human could have survived that? You didn't even survive it, how did you think I would have? I survived because I am meant to hold it, it chose me. And it made my life hell. It drove me mad… or at least I'm sure it did. Everyone told me I was. But that made things worse. Because they learnt how to bring it out… how to control it. I never knew how they did it, it shouldn't have been possible." She stopped and tried to lower her voice. She didn't want to shout at him anymore. The Doctor was staring at her wide eyes and shocked at the revelation. After all, she'd kept everything so quiet for weeks. The past hour had reveals so much… and it scared him.

"It gave me extra sight," she continued in a lower tone. "In my dreams I could see the timelines, stronger and much further forward than anyone had seen before. When I was only 130 I saw the Time War. There were only two paths. One with you… the one that was taken. And one with me. So yes, I'm glad that it went the way it did."

"Why?" he snapped walking right up to her, so he was looming over her. His furious eyes boring into hers. "So that _you_ didn't have to do it? So that _you_ didn't have to bare the guilt of being the Destroyer of Gallifrey!"

"So that I didn't _destroy__EVERYTHING!_" she shouted right back, not backing down. "If I had done it, I wouldn't have stopped at Gallifrey. At least you had something good at the end!"

Then she placed her hands on his temples and forced the images into his mind. She didn't even bother waiting for permission. And why not, he hadn't asked permission to watch into her dreams all those weeks ago. Because it had been her dream, not his. And she had to make him see. She didn't care what he found out about her past or who she was. She wanted him to know that he had done the right thing.

.

The Doctor watched the images pour into his head. Scene after scene of the Time War. The vision from Rose's mind making him wince in pain. With a bond as strong as the one she was forging, he could feel her emotions. He knew it was important she show it to him. So he watched the worst moment of his life replayed from another's eyes. He watched as Gallifrey fell, with him as the lone survivor.

…No, not so alone.

_There he saw a lone Dalek fall through time, it fell to earth where it burned for three days… screaming all the while. Four Daleks, the Cult of Skaro, stole a prison ship and entered a void ship, disappearing from existence. A broken half damaged Dalek broke through the Time Lock and rescued Davros. An injured Time Lord fled the battlefield, he regenerated into a child and all but threw himself into the Chameleon Arch. Lord President Drall put his hands to the head of the girl held captive before him. He forced her to regenerate into an infant then placed the screaming child into another Chameleon Arch._ He was not alone.

Then he saw himself moping through space, just him. The darkness and the guilt that burdened him weighing him down. He watched his energy fade as he gave up hope… But then he took the hand of a simple human shop girl and said one word. 'Run'. The love and hope and joy became part of his life again. He watched as moments from the last two years rushed by.

In the back of his mind he could feel Rose musing over the fact that the visions of her were clearer now that the timelines had become fixed. Then he felt her giddy laughter that it had been her all along.

But then he saw something that made his heart break further. He saw himself and Rose together, as they should have been. It hurt him to know that this would now never happen. He also felt that on feeling those emotions, Rose felt angry and annoyed and upset.

.

Then the scene changed. He knew they were watching a completely different timeline. The one that didn't happen. He heard Rose gasp as she saw what must be her. He heard the thought in her head.

'_I__ can __actually __see __what __I__ look __like __this __time. __I__ wonder __if __everything __will __be __this __clear__'__._

_._

_The room was dark and dingy. What little light there was came flashing through the bars as bombs exploded outside. At a first glace, the room was empty. But as yet another explosion lit up the cell they could see a figure huddled in the corner. She was undernourished and had dark circles under her eyes from lack of sleep. Her hazel eyes were tired and her dark blonde hair fell in greasy strings. It was almost like she had been completely forgotten in the war._

_They had put her here so she didn't use up all her regenerations before the right time._

The Doctor gasped aloud as he recognised Rose as she was now… only looking like she had lived in hell, locked away for years in a cell.

_With a rusted sounding squeal, the bars grated across and opened to reveal three figures. The figure in the middle was Drall. He was no longer Lord President, but he was still her keeper. Just as he had been since she was an infant._

"_It's time," he told her._

_The girl's eyes opened wide. "No," she whimpered curling into a tighter ball. "I won't do it." She didn't get much of a choice in the matter as the two men on either side of Drall dragged her up. There had once been a time when she had been strong enough to at least try and fight back. But now she couldn't. She'd been inside this tiny cell for hundreds of years. "No!" her whimpers turned into desperate screams as they dragged her out towards the battlefield. "No! You won't make me do it! Please you can't do this!"_

_Her cries caught the attention of someone in the battle. He stopped shooting with the gun that he so despised and ran over to them._

The Doctor was surprised to be looking at himself, his ninth self. He must have just regenerated days if not hours ago.

_He saw the frail girl being shoved about roughly; she looked like one more push would break her. He rushed closer and pushed one of the men out of the way._

"_What are you doing?" he cried dragging her away from them. She clung to him desperately. She couldn't let them get her. This man had to keep her safe, or no one ever would be again._

"_We are stopping the Time War, Doctor," Drall told him calmly. "She will lead us to our victory."_

"_She's only a girl!" he cried. "She's weak, she looks half dead!"_

"_Trust me, she's more than JUST a girl, Theta," one of the men told him._

"_Theta?" the girl suddenly cried looking up at him with such pure shining hope and delight. "Theta! Oh, my Theta!" Tears ran down her face as she clung to him even tighter. Finally, after so many centuries of trying to get back to him, she was here in his arms._

"_We don't have time for this," Drall said in a bored tone. "Seize her." The two men stepped up to drag her off him._

"_No!" she shrieked, and clung to his neck. Then the men pulled at her, and she was weak. But just before they managed to pry her from the Doctor's stronger grip, she whispered something in his ear. Just one word._ He couldn't hear the word though, there was an impact around it and it sounded muffled. Like the word was forbidden to his mind. It was her real name.

_His eyes widened as every single memory where he had used that name rushed back to him. The name she had been given washed away from the memories it covered. He was startled by what she had just done. You only told someone your name if you trusted them utterly and completely… if you loved them. Because compared to telling someone your name, saying that you loved them looked like nothing._

_And suddenly he was filled with anger. How could they do this to someone he cared so much for?_

"_Leave her alone!" he growled, stepping towards them with the look of the Oncoming Storm._

"_Not a chance," Drall sneered. "We need her. We need our Goddess." He looked up grinning as he saw a bomb drop from a Dalek ship above them. It was going to land very close to them, and everyone ran out of the way. Except when Drall ran, he pushed the girl right into the on coming blast._

"_No!" the Doctor shouted, but he was thrown onto the ground by the force. Those bombs were designed to kill Time Lords. She wouldn't survive; there would be no way for her to regenerate. He felt the tears run down his face as she was consumed by the fire. It wasn't fair, he'd only just found her again!_

_But as the flame and ash and debris cleared, he saw her, standing in a golden bubble of protection. But she wasn't herself anymore. Her eyes glowed gold with the power of the vortex. She was ethereal, no longer looking like the weak, starved and un-bathed woman she'd been a moment before. She looked bright and healthy._

_He whispered her real name fearfully as she stepped forward. _Once again, the Doctor couldn't hear what it was._ She walked up to him and helped him up. He could feel the power radiating from her. "Where is she?" he asked._

"_I am she," she replied, her voice echoing ethereally. "I am the vessel of the Time Vortex. It chose me, because of my strong emotions and compassion. But that will be my downfall. Please, Theta, you must run… I cannot protect you. They can almost control me. And if they get you, I will do anything they ask of me."_

_But just as she finished speaking, someone grabbed him from behind and shoved a blade at his throat. She raised a hand to disintegrate the blade, but nothing happened. It was a Vortex Blade. A weapon they had created from the Time Vortex itself. She could do nothing against it, nor the people who wield it._

"_Now," Drall grinned cruelly. "Since we appear to have some leverage, it is time to stop this infernal war… Or your beloved Theta dies. And you know he will not regenerate._

_Golden tears spilled down her cheeks… and the Dalek fleet above them disappeared. Every single Dalek in existence disappeared. Before their very eyes, Gallifrey was restored to its former full glory. It was as if the Time War never happened, even people who had died in the last few days, people whose bodies were still in tact, were alive once more…_

The Doctor watched the visions go by. They would not let the vortex leave her. She stayed as the Goddess, trapped that way forever. He watched as they used him as leverage against her. He was imprisoned and threatened, as was she. He watched as every single enemy of Gallifrey fell, and whole civilisations came into being once more. They used her when ever they wanted, becoming so corrupt. And for once, they did not sit by and do nothing, choosing only to sit and watch - they shaped the universe the way they saw fit. Becoming worse than the creatures they were destroying.

But time was changing too much and creatures that she could not destroy came along. The Reapers, the Shadows and many other creatures that healed time. Only they could not this time. There was nothing they could do. And any change they tried to make better, grew worse. Soon the universe fell into chaos as everything became dust. Eventually even Gallifrey was gone. The Doctor was gone, and she became vengeful in her grief of her loss and the grief of what she had done. And the universe was empty of everything. All the stars and all life. All of reality. Everything was silent.

She was the only thing left. And finally the Time Vortex released her… and let her die. And she welcomed the final silence.

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The Doctor gasped as she released his mind. His vision focused just in time to see the gold light leave her eyes, but the golden tears continued to flow. Weakly, she fell to the floor, her hands sliding from his face to cover her own. He was too in shock to even move. But then his senses caught up to him, and as an automatic - albeit, late - reaction, he stooped down to help her.

She shivered at his touch. He knew from the bond, that she had never seen it that clearly before. And it had hurt her to do so, and scared her to no end. She had thought that part of her life was over. And it was… but the thought was still painful.

He tried to swallow the thought that she had been kept in a cell her whole life. After all, she'd told him that she hadn't been happy most of her life, that she was trapped. She'd refused to tell him why.

Gasping and shaking from the shock, Rose stood. She couldn't face him right now. What she could have done was far worse than anything in existence… how could anyone even _look_ at someone who could do that.

The tears still running down her face, she pulled away from his grasp and sprinted to her room. She was so wrapped up in her horrid thoughts that she couldn't hear as the Doctor called after her. She didn't hear him shout her name. She didn't even notice that he had called her Rose.

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_**Phew… so, very intense chapter. I really wanted to show in detail what would have happened if she had destroyed Gallifrey. And how they were managing to control the Vortex. Because despite the fact the Vortex has no emotion, she still holds all her emotion and so her actions are bound by them.**_

_**Just so you know, he doesn't know she's Zeta yet. He suspects it in the back of his mind. But he doesn't find out for another ten minutes at least =D**_

_**Anyway, hope you enjoyed it!**_


	9. Truth and Nightmares

**Truth and Nightmares**

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The Doctor was left standing speechless at the console. He could hardly believe what he had just seen! Not only that, but in the 'path that hadn't been taken' she had told him her name… And he'd just called her Rose.

Had to be out of habit, right?

He needed to talk to her. He needed to know what had happened to her. He needed to know who she was. It was driving him mad! - He involuntarily shivered at the memory of her falling apart before him with madness.

The Doctor strode down to her room that he'd begrudgingly stayed quiet about her staying in, and didn't bother to knock. Though he was planning on being nice, he couldn't afford to be too polite with pleasantries.

Stepping in, he saw her sitting on her bed, tears running down her cheeks, though they were no longer golden. And she had a glass of water in one hand, something else clasped in the other. Around them, the TARDIS was humming in distress. In a second he realised what was happening. He lunged forward and grabbed her by the wrist just before she put the pills in her mouth.

"What the hell are you doing?" he hissed angrily.

"I have a headache," she said in bewilderment and confusion. She sounded so broken and innocent.

"So you decided to commit suicide!"

She looked at him in confusion a moment longer, then her eyes widened in realisation. Her hand sprung open and the two painkillers fell to the floor.

"Oh!" she gasped in horror. "Oh god, I forgot!" She covered her mouth in horror at the thought that she had very nearly killed herself. Fresh tears came to her eyes and he jumped on the bed and pulled her to him. It was such a natural reaction that it took a moment for him to realise he'd done it. By then she was sobbing into his shoulder, and he didn't have the hearts to let her go. She needed the comfort.

At the back of his mind he wondered if she'd ever been kept in that cell they'd seen. He could all too clearly recall her muttering about being trapped. And Rassilon, he hoped she hadn't.

.

A few minutes later, her sobs subsided and she became floppy and relaxed on top of him. When he brushed back her hair he saw her eyes closed, her deep breaths were sweeping evenly across his collarbone and he shivered. He made to leave, but she whimpered and her grip tightened. Once again, he didn't quite have the hearts, so instead he snuggled down and got them into a more comfortable position, kicking off his chucks in the process.

The movement seemed to wake her up a little and she squeaked sleepily, letting out a tired high pitch sigh.

"Theta?" she murmured quietly. He wasn't too sure if she was even half awake.

"Yes," he whispered.

"I forgive you," she told him, her voice hardly above a whisper. "I don't care you broke your promise. I'm just glad I have you back. I missed you." With that, she stilled and said no more, her breathing deep and even once again.

The Doctor had frozen beneath her as everything she'd said fell into place. That one sentence, 'I don't care you broke your promise'. He couldn't believe he'd been so blind as to not have seen it before.

He had made a promise that was out of his control, and it had been broke. She had gone mad when she looked into the Schism. She had only known him for a short time, yet cared for him more than anything. Things kept coming back to Drall, a man who had taken it upon himself to 'look after' her - if you could even call it that. She knew a horrid woman called Matron. She had said 'Z'… Z for Zeta.

Zeta, the long lost friend who had been taken away from him. The adorable, blue eyed girl who had taken his hearts, but never known it. He would never admit it, but when he had been younger and still held hope that she would recover and come back, he had hoped that he would have been matched with her. He cared for her so much one could almost say he was in love with her. He would never have seen it as an arranged marriage.

Gallifreyans held love for one another, especially their children. But they didn't really _fall _in love. They held respect for their friends and spouses'. Spouses that they had been matched with to maximise the potential of the offspring… Falling in love was rare, that love being requited was even rarer.

He almost laughed. He remembered at one point he had searched for Zeta's birth parents. He had never found out why they had been forced to give her up, but they had hated it. All he knew was that they had loved her, and they had loved each other. It was funny, looking back now, that it was in fact a couple that had _fallen in love_ that were the ones to give birth to what was possibly the most powerful Gallifreyan in history.

…The most powerful Gallifreyan in history. It scared him… scared the both of them.

"Zeta," he murmured, pulling her closer to him. "Oh, my dear Zeta. What happened to you?"

**?...DW…?**

Fifteen minutes later the Doctor was pulled from his doze like state by the figure shifting restlessly in his arms. Zeta whimpered and curled into him tighter.

"No…" she whimpered, trying to fend away the nightmare by using him. Tears squeezed from her tightly scrunched eyes, down her cheek. "Let me out, please, let me go…" her voice was only a murmur, but it rose to a cry and her next desperate plea. "Theta!"

"Zeta," he called shaking her lightly. Her eyes snapped open. "I'm here. It's okay, look." Looking at him, she let out chocked sob. Then she grabbed him by the lapels and dragged him to her and she curled desperately onto his chest. She was no longer crying, she didn't have many tears left. But she needed the contact, this contact. She needed to know he was really here.

"It's not a dream, it's not a dream," she muttered. "This is real, that was the dream. I'm on the TARDIS."

"Yes, this is real, you're here," he told her comfortingly, stoking her hair.

"Say it again," she demanded brokenly. "I need to hear you tell me that I'm not going to wake up back in that…"

"Cell?"

"No. No they hadn't put me in the cell yet. But I heard them talking about it… I was held in Drall's homes. My room was the only one with a decent window. It was the only one that my paintings would stay on. Everything else was white. Never ending white walls that closed in on me… I told you that fear wasn't irrational."

"And you were there the whole time?" he asked. "After you looked into the Schism, they kept you there?"

"I did try and escape," she smiled. "Nearly succeeded eight times."

"What happened?"

"If I got too far for them to stop me… they'd shoot. I didn't really care. I would have used up all my regenerations trying to get back to you. You were the only good thing in my life before I became human."

The Doctor mulled over those words… over everything she'd said that day.

"You're wrong you know," he told her quietly.

"What?" she looked up at him with fear in her eyes.

"You said that I didn't care, that I never tried looking for you. I did. We were eighteen when I was allowed my first leave from the Academy. Koschei didn't really bother. He just accepted that you'd been driven mad and thought you'd be better off alone. But I had to see you. I couldn't believe what they said. So I came to see you. The whole mansion was heavily guarded. I didn't get why they were so adamant not to let me in. I told them seeing me would probably help you… I tried coming back every day that month I was out. At least once a week every leave after that. They'd never let me in… Some-sometimes I heard you screaming…"

She ducked her head in and curled in even tighter - if that was possible. "I'm so sorry, Zeta."

"Don't call me that," she told him. "I hate that name. It was a name I was given, and they used it to hurt me."

"Then what am I supposed to call you?"

"Rose." He groaned and opened his mouth to argue. "I. Am. Rose," she growled sliding up to look him in the eye. "I always have been. Something must have gone wrong with the change, or the TARDIS felt sorry for me or something. Because I was a baby, I didn't need a rewrite of my personality. Just a memory wipe and species change. And changing back was different because to me it's not a dream. It was all real. I love Jackie. Thinking of Pete dying in my arms still makes me want to cry. I look at you and I am so in love that I would rather die now then leave you. Why won't you see that I _am_ Rose Tyler!" She grabbed his hands from around her and pressed his fingers to her temples. "Look!" she cried, her voice almost coming out as a growl.

"I - I can't," he stuttered.

"You have my permission. Everything, I'm not holding anything back. Now look!"

She gave his mind a little nudge forward. He felt the warmth and comfort it provided, and that was all his curious mind needed. Almost of its own accord, his mind went all the way into her mind.

Then he was drowning as memory after memory washed over him. He watched her grow up in the hands of her uncaring Matron. The happiness in her life as she ran through her childhood with him. He finally understood why she never wanted to go home, why she would have rather stayed at his side forever. He was her hope in a loveless life. Then he saw the torture her life became when she was taken away from him and locked away. It made his blood boil to see how cruel his kind really had been.

Then everything changed. All her memories were gone and she was starting life anew. It wasn't the best life, bought up by a broke single mother on a council estate. But she was loved. She always felt lucky for what she had. No matter how things went, how dull or horrible her human life became, she had always felt happy and optimistic, and glad that things weren't worse. Because part of her knew that there _was_ something worse.

Things became even better when a man with large ears and a leather jacket came into her life. He felt her joy of seeing so much, her wonder of the universe. He felt her excitement as they stepped out onto a new planet. He felt her fear that something was going to happen, not to her, but to him. He felt her grow closer and closer and even grow to love him. He felt her fear and confusion and loss when he had regenerated. And he felt the joy when she realised he was still her Doctor. He felt her love grow more and more…

He felt…

That was what he noticed. He felt. He shouldn't be able to feel, because those memories should have no emotion attached. But he did. He had felt all her emotions, because they were still there.

"But… that's not possible," he rasped.

"Isn't it?" she said gently, running a hand along his jaw. She felt him shudder and knew that he was trying to quash the hope. He'd lost so much he wouldn't be able to handle a false hope. She didn't know if she would be able to handle it if he still refused to believe her.

"But-but how could - there's no way that - it's never- how-?" he was at a loss for words as he battled with the unbelievable hope swelling in him. Because what he had seen had only meant one thing.

"I don't know," she said cupping his face in her hand and making sure he looked her in the eyes. She could see the anguish in his and wanted it gone. "It's never happened before, but then again, neither has the way that I was changed. I'm just glad it did happen. I would hate not really being a part of the best years of my life. And it turns out I was still me either way, it's no wonder I fell for you so fast."

He hadn't kept eye contact with her since she had changed back. He couldn't stand to look at her and see someone else looking back at him from her eyes. But looking at her now pushed him over the edge. Seeing the pure 'Rose' in her eyes, he pulled her to him and buried his head in her shoulder.

"I love you, Rose," he mumbled into her neck after a long moment. And he knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt that it really was her.

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><p><em><strong>About bloody time! Just a few more chapters left. Hope you enjoyed it!<strong>_


	10. One Big Krazy Alien Family

_**Sorry this took so bloody long! I got massive writers block on where to go from somewhere on the second page or so. I honestly couldn't get anything down. But I've finally overcome it.**_

_**I hope it was worth the wait!**_

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><p>.<p>

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**One Big Krazy Alien Family**

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The Doctor and Rose spent another whole week on the TARDIS. But it didn't drive them nuts this time. They had a lot of catching up to do, in more ways than one.

Rose told him about her many escape attempts and was even able to laugh at some of them. Like the times she had tricked the guards, or did something hilariously stupid or clever. She was quite offended that he was _surprised_ at how ingenious her escape plots had been.

He, in turn, had told her about, and even shown her some of the adventures he'd had before he found her again. He had laughed when he felt surges of jealousy flash through their telepathic link at the mention of companions like Sarah Jane (although that was not as harsh as the others), Nyssa and Romana. But she couldn't help it, the way he talked about them, so fondly, made her pout.

"Time Lords don't get jealous," he teased her.

"Yeah, well I'm a Time _Lady_. We can be as jealous as we want," she sulked, causing him to laugh even more.

"Oh come on, it's not like I liked and of them _that_ way. That's why you startled me so much. Somewhere in between 'run' and 'I could save the world, but lose you', I found myself feeling something I'd never felt so strongly before. I wanted to protect you more than anyone before and when you kept coming back…"

"Like I could leave you," she nudged him playfully. "Besides, this has been coming for hundreds of years."

"You know, it's strange knowing that you're 639 years younger than me when we were only born a few months apart."

"Would you rather I went travelling by myself for a few hundred years until I catch up. Then come back when we're the same age?" she joked.

"No!" he cried quite seriously, pulling her back down on the couch when she started to get up. "Never go. You're my Rose, and you are never leaving me again… not even for a day, you got that?"

"Wow, little possessive there."

"You started it," he mumbled into the crook of her neck.

"Well, you are mine, always have been," she said cheekily with her tongue in teeth grin. She turned in his arms and gave him a quick, soft kiss. He hummed in content.

"Well, if I'm your Doctor, then you're my Rose. You're mine. I'm allowed to be possessive."

"Sounds fair," she giggled tuning around again and relaxing back into him. They stayed like that for a while, just lying together on the study's couch. His breath tickled at her ear as his lips brushed the shell.

The Doctor made up his mind in that moment and whispered in her ear. Rose felt an impact in her mind then felt dizzy as memory after memory altered to reveal the true ones that their childhood bond had hidden.

"What?" she gasped looking at him, wide eyed.

"You heard me," he grinned at her. "And I'm not saying it again."

"You just told me your…" He nodded. And then the next thing he knew, her lips were on his and she was kissing him fiercely. After a moment she told him hers, after all, she'd told him in the Path that Never Was. Like her, he seemed somewhat disorientated. He shook his head to clear it.

"I love you, you know that?" he said cheerfully.

"Yep," she popped the 'P' and gave him her tongue in teeth grin. Suddenly she remembered something and she groaned.

"What is it?" he asked, slightly worried.

"We have to see Mum."

"Yeah, I can see why that would be a problem- Ow!" he pouted as she hit him in the shoulder.

"Last time she saw us, you were dragging me out of the house in a murderous rage. She deserves to know what's happened. I mean, she didn't take it well when you told her I wasn't really her daughter. What will she say when she finds out I've opened the watch."

"Well, whatever she says - if it's bad, that is - she won't get very far. I'll stop her and explain everything to her if I have to."

"Thank you," she said giving him a quick kiss. "Oh, and it might pay _not_ to tell her about the last few weeks. I may have forgiven you for being such a pig headed jerk, but I doubt she'll let it slide." She felt him shiver beneath her.

"Okay," he squeaked. "I vote on not telling her… Did I ever say I was sorry for that… for all of it?"

"A few times," she giggled. "Don't worry about it. I understand why you did it. Why you felt the way you did… I certainly didn't help."

"Mmm, you always have been stubborn. You want to know something?" he asked, a thoughtful smile on his face. "When I asked you to travel with me - as a human - the reason why I asked again… you reminded me a little Time Lady I once knew."

"For a genius, you really can be slow on the uptake and putting things together," she laughed.

"Ugh, don't remind me!" he cried. Then his tone became resigned. "So, your mother's then?"

"Doctor, we have a TARDIS. A _time machine_. I'm sure she won't even be able to tell the difference. I have something else in mind." She grinned at him cheekily, leaning down to kiss him again. Part of her realised that like the Doctor, she was much more tactile in this body. But this was much more than the need to be constantly touching. This was much deeper.

As he kissed her, the Doctor's hand brushed against her temple and he saw what was running through her mind. "I think I quite like the sound of that idea," he murmured. Suddenly he had flipped her onto her back and he was smiling down at her.

**?...DW…?**

'_That is so mean!'_ Rose thought. The Doctor grinned at her cheekily. Since they had created a bond, they could speak to each other in their minds as long as they had skin to skin contact.

'_Yeah, but it will be funny,_' he encouraged, giving her hand a squeeze.

'_Oh, it'll be hilarious! Let's do it… Although, you do know she'll probably slap you, right?'_

'_It'll be worth it,_' he told her. He raised his other fist and knocked on the door. There were hurried footsteps and the door swung open to reveal a somewhat distressed Jackie.

"Rose!" she cried almost in relief. She threw her arms around her daughter, eyeing the Doctor warily behind her back. He put on a hurt and confused face.

"Mum, are you okay? What's happened?" Rose asked in a panic, drawing back before Jackie could feel her hearts.

"What do you mean 'what's happened'?" she spluttered. "Are _you_ okay? He didn't hurt you did he?"

"What?" the Doctor growled, stepping protectively towards Rose. "Who wants to hurt her? Jackie, tell me, what do you know?" Jackie just looked at them in shock and confusion. They both knew why. They had purposely landed twenty minutes after they had last left. "Jackie, please. If Rose is in danger you _have_ to tell me!"

"What…? But you…" she just seemed lost for words.

"I'll be fine," Rose rolled her eyes. "I'm a big girl. Honestly, you two worry too much. I may not be a Time Lord, but I think I've cheated death a few times now," she grinned smugly. "Is Pete - Dad here? We found something in the future about him. Thought he might like to see it." And she pushed her way inside the house, leaving behind a stuttering Jackie.

"Don't look at me, she's your daughter," he said before following. He was barely holding back his laughter at Jackie's expression.

"Hold on Doctor!" she cried, suddenly dragging him into a side room. "What the hell is going on? Half a bloody hour ago you were storming in here and screaming at that girl. She looked terrified out of her wits! And now you're all happy and everything's just dandy!"

"Jackie, what_ are_ you on about?" he said in concern. "Have you been at the scotch again?"

"What? No! Look, I don't know what the bloody hell is going on!"

"There's a surprise," he muttered under his breath.

"Seriously, one bloody minute, you're in here harping on about how Rose is an alien and tearing our family apart. And now-"

"What? Rose being an alien?" he scoffed. "You really have been at that scotch, haven't you? She's too skinny to be a Slitheen, and I'm pretty sure I'd notice if she'd been possessed or swapped. And if she was born an alien that would mean that you were one too. Well, you or Pete."

"But I can't have kids! You said it yourself. Those memories were implanted in my mind."

"Really Jackie, this is a little overboard don't you think? I know Rose. I care for her more than anything. I would know if she weren't human."

"But…"

"Come on, I'll prove it to you." Without waiting for her reply, he walked out of the room and into the lounge, hiding the huge grin on his face. In the lounge, Rose sat beside Pete, showing him the news paper clipping they had found in 2016. He had a rather bewildered look on his face that the Doctor knew had nothing to do with what he was being shown. "Rose? Are you alright?" he asked cautiously.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she replied.

"Hey, Rose, remember that Hoix we were up against the first time we saw Elton grown up?" he tested.

"Do I ever! Red bucket, blue bucket. You need to make up your mind.

"One fish, two fish. Red fish, blue fish. I very clearly said 'not blue'!"

"Did not!" the smile ran away from her face when he took out the sonic-screwdriver and bleeped it up and down her body. "What are you doing?" he asked cautiously.

"Your mother thinks you're an alien," he said simply as he checked the results. The Gallifreyan that was projected in front of him (only visible to him, of course) told him that she was 130% Time Lord… 130%? He'd have to look into that later, but it was probably just the Vortex. He looked up at Jackie and lied. "See, 100% human. Pete, you may have to start hiding the vodka."

"What do you mean 'she thinks I'm an alien'?" Rose cried.

At the same time Jackie shouted, "I'm not bloody well drunk! You told me she would be an alien when she opened that blinking watch!"

"What watch?" he said, false worry starting to creep into his voice.

"That watch you had with you the other day!"

"Jackie… we didn't have a watch with us…"

"Oh! Oh, god! You're time travellers!" she suddenly remembered. She paled and looked between the two of them in panic. "Oh my god! I've screwed up time! I've created a paradox thingy!" Suddenly the both burst out into peals of laughter. Jackie looked at the two of them, even more bewildered than before.

"I'm - I'm sorry," Rose struggled to get out. "Oh, Rassilon, your faces!"

"What?" Jackie stuttered. It was another few minutes before they calmed down and whipped the tears from their eyes.

"Sorry, Mum. We couldn't help ourselves," she gasped. "It- it's okay, we're not from the wrong timeline."

"You little-! You let me think I had-!" They both had to cover their mouths to stifle the giggles that threatened to burst forth. But Jackie surprised them by doing something they never thought they'd ever see. She let it go. "So, you're still my Rose then. You haven't opened the watch?"

"Kind of," Rose told her awkwardly. "I'm still your Rose… but I have opened the watch."

"But_ he_ said you wouldn't be Rose Tyler if you did that," she nodded at the Doctor.

"Yeah," he said tugging at his ear. "When I said that, I didn't really think it was possible that she had been Rose Tyler _before_ she was in the watch in the first place." Jackie just stared at them blankly. "Something went wrong with the process and she's still the exact same person. As a human, she was the same person as who she regenerated as, and kept her feelings and emotions of her human life. She always was, and still is, Rose Tyler."

"Then what was with the big angry Time Lord act?"

"Yeah… I needed a bit of convincing. We're both a little stubborn. I was firm on my beliefs and I didn't want her hurting and tricking you when by my reckoning you should be grieving for the loss of your daughter… Turns out I was…" the last word was mumbled so quietly they couldn't hear it.

"What was that, Doctor?" Rose asked cheekily, teasing him and forcing it out of him, despite the fact they all knew what it was meant to me."

"I was wrong," he mumbled a little louder.

Jackie began to laugh. "Never thought I'd see the day. See now, was that so hard?" The Doctor just grumbled. "And what about you?" she asked Rose. "If he's 900, how old are you really? And who were you before all this?"

"I'm 263 in total. And everyone knew me as Zeta. But I didn't really have the best of lives and I'd rather forget that name. I'd just prefer to be called Rose… Rose Tyler if you'll let me."

"Of course you can!" Jackie cried, jumping up and sweeping her into her arms. "I don't care how old you are or what bloody species you are or even that you're not my birth daughter. You're still the little girl that I raised."

"Thank you, Mum," Rose whispered, a tear leaking down her cheek. "And I guess, since I don't trust anyone more than my parents… and the Doctor… you two deserve to know this." And she told them her true name. It didn't have the same effect as on Time Lords, where all the memories rushed back. But it did appear to have some sort of effect on them because they both shivered in response.

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"Ooh! And guess what?" the Doctor said to break the tension after a long momentous pause. "Rose and I were what you would call the Gallifreyan equivalents of childhood sweethearts!" He pulled one of his cheeky grins and held Rose's hand tighter. Jackie just gave them a look.

"But she's… 600 and something years younger than you!" She cried. "Still, guess it's better than over 850."

"It's 639 years difference. And actually, I was born a few months after him," Rose told her. "First and only two in 4,000 years to actually be born, not loomed. - Anyway, we got out of sync when I got bought to you and he carried on through his travels and the Time War, etc."

"Okay… right… So does that mean you two are a couple now?"

The Doctor opened his mouth to 'um' and 'ah' and babble. But Rose cut over top of him "Yep," she said cheerfully.

Jackie turned on the Doctor. "You know, she's like you. The only one like you. She's gonna live just as long and she's gonna out live us. One day you're all she's gonna have. I hope you're planning on marrying that girl one day because you're an idiot if you don't."

"Erm," the Doctor stuttered awkwardly, running a hand through the back of his hair. "Actually, um. According to Gallifreyan tradition, erm, we're, ah… we're already married," he finished quickly.

"Well, congratulations!" Pete said, speaking up for the first time. Jackie was obviously surprised, but nodded in agreement as everything battled it out in her head.

"Yeah… But you're having a human one too," she finally said in a firm tone. Rose and the Doctor looked at each other and sighed.

There was no getting out of this one.

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><p><em><strong>=D And that's all folks! I really couldn't resist teasing Jackie. And yeah, after all she's been through, I think she'd be more worried about if her daughter was okay, rather than berating them.<strong>_

_**I hope you enjoyed this!**_


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